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Winter
December 11, 2014
She seemed
carefree and resilient
to the harsh winds
surrounding us.
"Can you hear it?"
She whispered.
"Hear what?"
Smiling. "The sound of snow.
Falling on the ground."
I closed my eyes
and focused.
It was soft.
A breath escaped my lips.
"...Yeah. I hear it."
Then, no more words
were uttered.
We were both captured
in the awe of winter,
by the sharp but silent
sting of wind,
by the exquisite sound
of snowflakes landing
on patches of grass
and by the clouded gray sky,
which seemed to be painted
with long brush strokes.
It was winter.
It meant frigid evenings
where we would sit outside.
Mugs of steaming coffee in our
hands,
contemplating the night sky
and possibly the stars if the
clouds were not covering the view.
And we would talk.
We would sing.
We would laugh.
And we would think.
And sip sweetened snowflakes.
© Jaycee R., Lewisville, TX
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This article has 17 comments.
fabrication SILVER said...
on Feb. 9 2015 at 7:46 pm
Busy busy busy. I barely have time to write anymore. It's a shame.
fabrication SILVER said...
on Feb. 3 2015 at 5:52 pm
I am just working on my novel for now. I am really busy with schoolwork etc... so not really any poems. You?
Same here! I usually write from experiences, but this time I didn't with my poem. Hey, actually, I could use your help. Could you look at it? I'm in need of some critiquing. It's at this link: TeenInk.com/poetry/all/article/754857/Simply-Lies/
fabrication SILVER said...
on Jan. 12 2015 at 10:27 pm
Surprisingly, you're right. Yes, it was from experiences that I've had, as most of my writings are. And about the question of the stories, they are short chapters, not poems, just lyrical and poetic in nature. They are stories though, with dialogue and characters, plot etc.
Oh, duh. That must have been obvious, lol. :) (and I have no idea why my other comment was repeated, but anyway...) That's awesome! Is it like a story with poems in it or just a collection of poems? I haven't published any books of my poetry yet, but I definitely will soon. I have written so many I don't know what to do with them. Well, enter them in contests I suppose... Anyway, I have to ask...is Winter written from an experience you had or is it made up? My poem, Simply Lies, that was recently accepted for TeenInk was totally from my imagination, although it may seem it came from experiences I had. Is it the same way with yours? It sounded pretty deep. :)
fabrication SILVER said...
on Jan. 11 2015 at 7:47 pm
Yes, and I actually do write "poems" like these into a novel. Novels. It's actually an upcoming genre in the North American literature scene, to make chapters short (100-250 words), brief, poetic. Haha, I found out that you were probably a girl when you said that 'not many boys write poems' :P
Well, I'm obviously a girl, and I have to say your poem was really impressive, even more now. ;) You are really good at it, and I'm not just saying that. :) Anyway, you are right. It is more like a story, but has a poem-like sound and feel. I write those kind of poems all the time. It feels like you can give the reader more meaning when you make it that way rather than just piece together words, know what I mean?
fabrication SILVER said...
on Jan. 10 2015 at 12:41 pm
Yes. I am a boy. xD I know what you mean. I feel like it is poetic in style but not really a poem in itself. The context is lyrical but its more of a story. I am not very good at poems. But o understand what you're saying haha :)
fabrication SILVER said...
on Jan. 9 2015 at 8:47 pm
Oh my... T-T I feel so grateful. I don't even know what to say ;;
fabrication SILVER said...
on Jan. 9 2015 at 5:11 pm
I am glad that my writing was able to reach you. I am also glad that I successfully created a "winter" using words (at least for you). Thank you for the comment.
Writer13 said...
on Jan. 8 2015 at 5:50 pm
Woaw, that was beautiful! Absolutely amazing how you capture the very essence of the dead of winter. It took my breathe away!
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Favorite Quote:
"May your mouth sing and your soul soar, but if your heart breaks that's all the more whole-hearted the words will make you, and you will soon unlock the summit of understanding." ~quote by me