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Pick-Up Lines

May 28, 2014
By TaylorWintry DIAMOND, Carrollton, Texas
More by this author
TaylorWintry DIAMOND, Carrollton, Texas
72 articles 0 photos 860 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Never fear shadows. They simply mean there's a light shining somewhere nearby." - Unknown

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No, it really didn't hurt when I fell from heaven.

You ask me that question all the time, but I just don't understand it.

If heaven's in the sky, wouldn't you just float down through clouds?

I'm sure you would be provided with a parachute, or maybe you'd land on a plane.

In that case, yes, it would hurt.



I'd rather not be the only ten you see.

I don't really want to stand out all that much.

And anyway, how do I know you're not grading on a scale of 100?

In that case, that's a little offensive.



I'm sorry you hurt yourself falling for me.

But honestly, if you had just looked down, you would've seen the curb.

In that case, I have some bandaids in my purse.



Pick yourself up, boy.

I'm already standing.

© Brendan P., Carbondale, CO

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JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 19 comments.

TaylorWintry DIAMOND said...
on Jan. 25 2015 at 10:48 pm
TaylorWintry DIAMOND, Carrollton, Texas
72 articles 0 photos 860 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Never fear shadows. They simply mean there&#039;s a light shining somewhere nearby.&quot; - Unknown

View profile
Thank you! I tried to add a bit of awkwardness, because us girls know that pick-up lines are literally so painful. Thank you so much! (:
Crystallite BRONZE said...
on Jan. 25 2015 at 10:39 pm
Crystallite BRONZE, Santa Elena, Other
2 articles 2 photos 347 comments
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dude.I just love this poem! It is about time that us girls responded to those pick up lines hehe and that is exactly what you did but in a more poetic way. This is just beautiful and I like it a lot! especially the ending lol
TaylorWintry DIAMOND said...
on Jan. 25 2015 at 10:35 pm
TaylorWintry DIAMOND, Carrollton, Texas
72 articles 0 photos 860 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Never fear shadows. They simply mean there&#039;s a light shining somewhere nearby.&quot; - Unknown

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Thank you so much. Will do!
Ray--yo PLATINUM said...
on Jan. 24 2015 at 8:36 am
Ray--yo PLATINUM, Kathmandu, Other
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God Makes No Mistakes. (Gaga?)<br /> &quot;I have hated the words and I have loved them, and I hope I have made them right.&quot; -Liesel Meminger via Markus Zusac, &quot;The Book Thief&quot;

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The last two lines are perfect to end the poem, and this is coming from a guy. Really enjoyable, Taylorwintry, please keep writing :)
TaylorWintry DIAMOND said...
on Jan. 18 2015 at 1:37 pm
TaylorWintry DIAMOND, Carrollton, Texas
72 articles 0 photos 860 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Never fear shadows. They simply mean there&#039;s a light shining somewhere nearby.&quot; - Unknown

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Hahaha, thanks! I appreciate it!
Nimra BRONZE said...
on Jan. 16 2015 at 9:33 pm
Nimra BRONZE, New York, New York
2 articles 0 photos 25 comments
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You go girl! Don't let guys bring you down!
TaylorWintry DIAMOND said...
on Jan. 16 2015 at 8:59 pm
TaylorWintry DIAMOND, Carrollton, Texas
72 articles 0 photos 860 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Never fear shadows. They simply mean there&#039;s a light shining somewhere nearby.&quot; - Unknown

View profile
Thank you so much! (To be honest, I was a little skeptical about the BandAids part, but I'm glad you liked it :D .)
Helena_Noel BRONZE said...
on Dec. 14 2014 at 10:44 pm
Helena_Noel BRONZE, Burnt Hills, New York
1 article 0 photos 629 comments

Favorite Quote:
&ldquo;I&#039;d rather see a sermon than hear one any day; I&#039;d rather one should walk with me than merely tell the way: The eye&#039;s a better pupil and more willing than the ear, fine counsel is confusing, but example&#039;s always clear.&rdquo; -Edgar Guest

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Ho ho! Brilliant! :)
The confused/facetious tone was perfect, and its remarkably clever and plithy. I like the part about baidaids. 5/5, Write on!
TaylorWintry DIAMOND said...
on Nov. 14 2014 at 11:00 am
TaylorWintry DIAMOND, Carrollton, Texas
72 articles 0 photos 860 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Never fear shadows. They simply mean there&#039;s a light shining somewhere nearby.&quot; - Unknown

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Thanks! :D
simple_effect SILVER said...
on Nov. 7 2014 at 5:47 pm
simple_effect SILVER, Franklin Park, New Jersey
6 articles 0 photos 26 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Security is a superstition; it does not exist in nature. Life is either one daring adventure or nothing.&quot; ~Helen Keller

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This is awesome!  Not only did it make me laugh a little it is very clever word play.  This is great!
TaylorWintry DIAMOND said...
on Sep. 25 2014 at 9:59 pm
TaylorWintry DIAMOND, Carrollton, Texas
72 articles 0 photos 860 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Never fear shadows. They simply mean there&#039;s a light shining somewhere nearby.&quot; - Unknown

View profile
Thank you!
theblondechick GOLD said...
on Sep. 25 2014 at 10:13 am
theblondechick GOLD, Kingsport, Tennessee
14 articles 0 photos 104 comments

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How clever! I love the very last line about how the boy needs to pick himself up!
TaylorWintry DIAMOND said...
on Jul. 9 2014 at 8:52 pm
TaylorWintry DIAMOND, Carrollton, Texas
72 articles 0 photos 860 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Never fear shadows. They simply mean there&#039;s a light shining somewhere nearby.&quot; - Unknown

View profile
Thanks a bunch! (:
Sparrow01 SILVER said...
on Jul. 9 2014 at 1:12 pm
Sparrow01 SILVER, Appalachin, New York
8 articles 0 photos 30 comments
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This is so neat and clever :)
TaylorWintry DIAMOND said...
on Jun. 14 2014 at 11:31 pm
TaylorWintry DIAMOND, Carrollton, Texas
72 articles 0 photos 860 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Never fear shadows. They simply mean there&#039;s a light shining somewhere nearby.&quot; - Unknown

View profile
Oh gosh, thanks a bunch.
Z.V.Oksana PLATINUM said...
on Jun. 14 2014 at 2:43 pm
Z.V.Oksana PLATINUM, Harrison, Arkansas
22 articles 1 photo 60 comments

Favorite Quote:
&ldquo;Maybe you can afford to wait. Maybe for you there&#039;s a tomorrow. Maybe for you there&#039;s one thousand tomorrows, or three thousand, or ten, so much time you can bathe in it, roll around it, let it slide like coins through you fingers. So much time you can waste it.<br /> But for some of us there&#039;s only today. And the truth is, you never really know.&rdquo; <br /> ― Lauren Oliver, Before I Fall

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Your writing is so great. I can't get enough :)
mereCat PLATINUM said...
on Jun. 10 2014 at 10:11 am
mereCat PLATINUM, Horsham, Other
46 articles 0 photos 183 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;I am finally colouring inside the lines I live between&quot;

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That's OK; you are very talented (:
TaylorWintry DIAMOND said...
on Jun. 9 2014 at 10:56 pm
TaylorWintry DIAMOND, Carrollton, Texas
72 articles 0 photos 860 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Never fear shadows. They simply mean there&#039;s a light shining somewhere nearby.&quot; - Unknown

View profile
Oh my gosh, thanks so much! I'm glad someone saw it. (: Nobody else has said anything. X) anyway, thanks so much. It means a lot.(:
mereCat PLATINUM said...
on Jun. 9 2014 at 2:18 am
mereCat PLATINUM, Horsham, Other
46 articles 0 photos 183 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;I am finally colouring inside the lines I live between&quot;

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I really love your poetry, I've just read through several pages of stuff and I am very impressed. Your writing is really unique and I love the way you use similies and metaphores so origionally. People always use them in description but few people manage to use fresh and well-fitting ones like you. Oh and well done on the Educator of the year thing - I saw your piece in the magazine. Very well deserved :)