Waking up in a space unknown to many people.  Pure darkness in a dash of pain.  The sound of my own scream echoing like it is bouncing off thousands of walls but yet it seems to get louder as I try to fight everything off. Knowing I have to survive yet another day of fighting demons and facing societies rules. Being myself. 

Fighting off the internal demons that scratch inside of me trying to escape the cage I fought to trap them in. 

I know there is nothing wrong with me but the others out there don’t understand. 

I breathe the same air as them, see the same people as them. 

But yet we fight, we argue and we kill.

 I see the chaos and something is awoken inside of me. 

The demon is slowly breaking the cage open. 

I’m stuck forcing them down my windpipe through my lungs back into my chest. 

Forcing the cage closed and making it tighter. The breathing in my chest gets tighter as I am fighting through the pain. Struggling to keep them in the cage. 

This is how I am growing as a trans teen. 

I dress how I want and do what I want.  I wear my beautiful flowing dresses while telling myself I’m a b*tch and a boss. I fight society's definition of normal by saying I am a woman not a man.  

Without listening to the demon saying I’m not a real woman. 

Or that I’m fake. 

I push it down and drown out the voice. 

Keeping the positive focus on the fact  that I am real. 

To quote the film Camp Rock 

“This is real, This is me

I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be, 

now Gonna let the light shine on me” 

Demi Lovato. 

And now I am going to let my bright  light defeat the demon. 

Destroying it as I cry a scream of victory. 

The demon is fighting to take me over. I tell it though that my past won’t be changed. So I tell it I am in control. Fighting to keep everything uttered and under control. Fighting it takes all of my energy. But I am telling it that it will be vanquished. I will win. Keeping every last piece of raw emotion to defeat it.  

Feeling my body being torn apart by the light. 

Kicking the demon out of my body. 

The final thing I hear is a thundering shrieking scream uttering the last breath. 

Because I defeated it and I became a proud open transgender teen.