All Nonfiction Bullying Books Academic Author Interviews Celebrity interviews College Articles College Essays Educator of the Year Heroes Interviews Memoir Personal Experience Sports Travel & CultureAll Opinions Bullying Current Events / Politics Discrimination Drugs / Alcohol / Smoking Entertainment / Celebrities Environment Love / Relationships Movies / Music / TV Pop Culture / Trends School / College Social Issues / Civics Spirituality / Religion Sports / Hobbies
- Summer Guide
- College Guide
- Author Interviews
- Celebrity interviews
- College Articles
- College Essays
- Educator of the Year
- Personal Experience
- Travel & Culture
- Current Events / Politics
- Drugs / Alcohol / Smoking
- Entertainment / Celebrities
- Love / Relationships
- Movies / Music / TV
- Pop Culture / Trends
- School / College
- Social Issues / Civics
- Spirituality / Religion
- Sports / Hobbies
- Community Service
- Letters to the Editor
- Pride & Prejudice
- What Matters
Ashes & Wine
My name’s Almina Blue Crossworthy. I have a twin sister named Scarlet Savannah Crossworthy and a baby brother named Philip Brown Crossworthy. My mother’s divorced and has a new husband that I treat as my father. This is me…
My life? From an outsider’s view, it’s perfect. But to me, all I see is a happy family, nothing special. You see, I once thought that my parents were perfect. Their love was vibrant and you could see it in their eyes. When they would look at me and my siblings, they would grin from eye to eye. We may not be rich, but we were happy. When I got to second grade, I pitied my classmates with the broken families. I wished that their family will be as love-filled like ours. But little did I know that that could all change.
At the age of 8, I was a bright kid. I was more mature than others. So I knew why my dad had to go out of town. We were slowly going broke. My mother tried her hardest to work, but in the end, it just wasn’t enough. It was hard to find suitable jobs for my parents. Both of them don’t have a degree. My mom got pregnant with me and Scarlet when she was 18, causing her and my 19 year old father to stop going to school and start working. After a year, we were born.
When I was 9, I started asking my nanny—who was with us for almost 6 years—why we were slowly going broke. Well, that’s when she told me and my sister that my father was a hopeless immature alcoholic that never gets anything done. He used up all of our savings in throwing parties everywhere. At first I didn’t believe her. I loved my father, even more than my mother. But when I heard my mom arguing with someone over the phone, I knew it was my father. I heard her shouting and crying, yelling things like: ‘why did you sleep with her?’ or ‘what did I do wrong?’.
It was unbearable. I cried for days with only my sister knowing what the problem was. She was the only one I could turn to at those times. After another year, when my father went home, my mom threw him out of our lives. Divorce papers came and went. And that was when I knew that I was afraid to fall in love. Afraid to have my heart broken like my mother. We moved and my mother landed a job as a model for the local magazine. She found the perfect guy for her and for us. Our lives became easy.
But when we stepped in freshmen year of high school, all of them took my sister away. She became popular and I stayed in the shadows. She has the whole cheerleading squad and football jocks; I have my only normal friend. She has the guys, I have my books. And when one day, a month of being in hell high, a guy with the most charming looks walked up to me and asked me out. Of course, knowing me being a crazed fifteen year old outcast, I gladly agreed. We went out on several other dates and I thought it was perfect.
Well, until he tried to kiss me on our fifth date. I knew that I wasn’t ready for it. I was cautious when it comes to love. I mean, I dodged because I know that I wasn’t ready and I know that I only like him. The other day after the date that he tried to kiss me, he broke it off. He told me that we needed to stop seeing each other. I was hurt. I thought it was because I stopped him from kissing me but I was wrong. He had this smug look on his face when he told me that he only dated me to get closer to my sister. And well, let’s just say that I acted properly. I slapped him. Twice. I didn’t cry over him for the fact that I know that he wasn’t worth it.
After that, I knew that I needed to be more cautious. But that didn’t stop the other 7 boys from trying. And well, they won. Heartaches after heartaches. And when I thought that it was all over, I bumped into a guy at a park. He had the cutest smile. He looked Asian and cute; brown hair and brown eyes. With a name that stuck to me, John Joseph Dee. A week after that, I saw him at school and we started hanging out. Two months later, we were dating. He knew me inside out. He knew my family, my sister and my life. He was the very first guy I fell in love with. He was my first kiss, my first love… my first ultimate heartbreak. A month before the end of the school year, he broke it off. I didn’t know why. Of course I cried! With the red eyes and snot-filled nose. I bawled my eyes out when the next day at school he was nowhere to be found. I bawled my eyes out when after 2 weeks I found out he moved back to the Philippines. I bawled my eyes out for months until it was already summer.
I was heartbroken. A zombie as my family put it. I thought I had enough of this hideous thing called love. But when my sister dragged me out of the house one day, I bumped into yet another guy on our way to the mall, a guy named Lucas Murray. He had the looks, the personality and the package. So I ended up running away from him. I didn’t need another heartbreak. I’ve had enough. But I ended up failing. There was something about him that pulled me. It wasn’t really romantic. But with his personality and looks… It’s hard to resist him. I decided to go for the kill, to pass it off as a summer fling. When we dated we were happy, I forgot about John. He wasn’t a rebound. I felt safe with him. He promised me that he’ll never leave me like John did. He promised me a lot of stuff. Of course, I believed him.
When summer was halfway over, I found out something that I did not expect. Something that I wished I would forget. That time, it was me who broke it. My second heartbreak. And now, after tons of thinking, I’m ready to take on my sophomore year with a heart of steel. No one will touch my heart except family. No one will hurt me again like my father, John and Lucas hurt me. No one. No one.
Chapter 1: “You know what Blue, wear the first one—no, no, the other—no! Sheesh, yes that one!” I sighed deeply as I obeyed my sister. It was her turn to choose what I wear, we do this things everyday. Every Mondays, Wednesdays, Fridays and Sundays, she’ll be the one to pick what I’ll wear and for the rest, it’s my option. I pulled on the simple white camisole over my strapless bra and put a dark blue tank top with 3 buttons on the front on top of it. My jeans were distressed and had a few random rips here and there. I faced the long mirror that dominated half of the walk-in-closet and immediately grimaced at the blurry view my vision held. “See! You look good without your hoodies and such!” Scar commented with her ‘I-know-this-stuff’ voice. But it was soon followed by a sigh when I slipped on the gray jacket and zipped it up halfway. With a satisfied smile, I reached for my glasses that were perched on the make-up table that I don’t really use and placed it on the bridge of my nose. Unlike my sister, I don’t have her shining beacon of a blonde hair that was more of a golden color than blonde and her pretty blue eyes. Yes, you can tell that she can be the ideal stereotype of a school b***h and a human-sized Barbie doll. And here comes the so-called twin, the very brunette, blue eyed, outcast twin… me. You think that we’re both pretty and unique on our own ways? Well, you’re perfectly wrong. My sister got the winning looks of our idiot-of-a-biological-father and the killer body my mother has. While I got some kind of joke. I didn’t even look anything like my mother or my father. They were both gorgeous. I have a plain face but my sister passes it off as natural beauty (Pffft! Yeah right!), a ‘straight’ body but my sister just thinks that I was naturally kind of skinny and that I always wear bigger clothes and it makes it look like I have a shapeless body, and I think my boobs got left behind in puberty but my sister says it was just right for my body. Yeah, I could say that my sister was my motivator. Even when she became popular, she tried to drag me with her. But I just didn’t fit in. You could say that we were strangers when it comes to looks, but when it comes to personalities, we are true twins. We think alike and we never leave anyone behind. We’re not the type of twins or sisters that when the other becomes popular and the other gets left behind, the popular one makes the other ones life a living hell. We love each other to the fullest. She’s my best friend and I’m her best friend. I’m the only one that can call her Scar while the rest of the world calls her Savannah and she’s the only one that can call me Blue when the people that know me calls me Almina. “I can’t wait to go to school!” I tried to sound as enthusiastic as possible; but failed miserably. I pulled my hair into a tight neat ponytail and clasped the silver heart padlock and key necklace around my neck. It was long and it hanged in the middle of my chest. Scar had the same identical set. We bought it at the same time, I gave her mine and she gave me hers. It meant that the both of us have the key to each other’s hearts. Get it? I grabbed my sling bag and placed it on my shoulder. After double checking if I have everything, I crossed the walk-in closet that Scar and I shared and went inside the double doors to get to Scar’s room. “Scar! Let’s go!” I shouted as loudly as I could. Scar emerged from her bathroom door with her cheerleading uniform on. I quickly lifted an eyebrow and pointed at her outfit. “Why the hell are you wearing that?” She rolled her eyes and grabbed her knapsack and we headed towards the driveway. Scar knew how much I hated the uniform; it was so short and tight! “Don’t tell me that you forgot.” She said tiredly. I just shrugged a sorry. “You forgot that every first day of school the cheer squad presents after the opening ceremony?” Ugh…. I forgot about that! ~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~ As Sir Victor, our driver, neared the school gates, I could feel myself getting tense. I could almost see the scenario that was bound to happen. The car stops, the crowd that was waiting for Scarlet to come out will run towards us and cheer like Scar’s a bigger celebrity than Demi Lovato. I go out first and get pushed about until I fall flat on my ass or face first. Scarlet gets a fit and glares at everyone and then helps me get up and then… the jocks and cheerleaders devour her, but not before sending me an apologetic look. The car finally came to a stop and I pulled up my hood over my head and gripped the strap of my bag tightly, with my head down, I burst out the door expecting the force of students pushing me. But what I didn’t expect was the non existent crowd. I probably look like a crazy lady with my mouth hanging wide open. It was peaceful. Not a sign of student around. I searched the school for some kind of crowd and immediately spotted the bright flashy uniforms of the cheer squad and the warning signs of the jackets of the football team surrounding their usual spot near the school doors. “What on earth are they fussing about?” I murmured absent-mindedly. “Whoa… Isn’t this nice? Coming to school for once without anyone trying to desperately talk to me or ask me out. So far so good huh?” “Yeah…” I just kept looking at the crowd. Even other students were starting to crowd around the ‘it’ crowd. “Are you okay?” Scar asked me. Her concern snapped my attention back. I gave Scar my winning smile and tilted my head to the side. “Of course I am.” She grinned at me in return. I turned my head back to the crowd and wondered what they were fussing about. I heard Scar suddenly giggle. Her eyes were twinkling with her ‘I-know-what-you’re-thinking’ look. “You wanna know what are they fussing about don’t you?” I couldn’t stop the blush that was creeping up my face. God, she knew me well. Would it hurt to know what was going on? I mentally kicked myself and shook my head. “Yeah, okay, I do wanna know. But I vowed not to get involved in anything about guys, status, romance and popularity.” Her face fell when I said the popularity part; she thought that I meant her. I grinned at her to make her feel better and bumped my hip with her. “Well, except you Scar.” She opened her mouth to say something but another voice cut in. “Savannah!” It squealed. I looked behind her and immediately grinned at one of the few cheerleaders that I was close with. Her name was Hershey Saunders. She, unlike the other cheerleaders, had fire for hair and melted chocolate for eyes. She was stunning. When she caught sight of me, she launched herself into my arms and pinched my cheek, making it red and sore. Laughing, I hugged her back. “Oh my gosh!! I miss you guys!!!” She squealed once more. She hugged Scarlet and pulled back to look at me. “Why aren’t you dressed all sexy? And why haven’t you got your contacts?” I shrugged and pointed at the laughing Scarlet. Hershey shot Scar ‘the’ glare and placed her hands on her hips. “Didn’t we plan on making Ally ultra-sexy this year?” She asked accusingly. I rolled my eyes and kissed both of their cheeks before turning to leave. I did not want to be there when they have that kind of conversation. On my way towards the doors I passed the ‘it crowd’ and heard some laughter then a voice of a somewhat familiar guy. Huh, maybe it was a new transferee. I thought wildly. Entering the halls again after months of vacation (more like hell camp) brought back unnecessary memories of my past freshmen year. The memories that I didn’t dare look at. I shook my head furiously and took out the paper where my information was. I headed straight for my locker and sighed with relief when there were no weird kids (the ones that looks like they’re taking drugs or something) or stupid jerks—I mean jocks surrounding it. I opened my locker and started dumping my things in there. I taped an extra print of my timetable against the inside door of my locker and pulled out the small pouch looking sling bag containing my comb, iPhone, iPod, electronic dictionary, a few pens, and a notebook for doodling. With having everything all set, I walked off to the stairs and headed for my hideout.
Chapter 2: I leaned against the railing of the rooftop that gave a great view of the horizon and took a deep breath. This is my den. I always go here on free periods, before classes, breaks, and even after school. This is the only place that I can draw peacefully and without interruptions. I glanced at my clock and noted myself that there’s still half an hour—yeah, we go to school freakishly early—until the first bell. I set my iPod alarm into ten minutes before the bell and plugged the earphones in my ears and tapped on shuffle. I walked over to the stairs that led to a little balcony on top of the rooftop and sat on the stone benches near the railings before pulling out the spiral notebook that I doodle on and chose a pencil. With ‘Closer To The Edge’ by 30 Seconds To Mars playing, my pencil darted across the ivory paper. My mind tuned out from my surroundings and the song became background music, like the humming of the fridge or an open television in the other room. My hand moved gracefully and left a trail of gray-ish black lines, my glasses were slipping the bridge of my nose but I ignored it. The image slowly began to make sense. A minute passed and I was just touching it up when my alarm rang. I sighed and turned off my iPod before putting it inside my bag. I stood up and took a look at my drawing. A smile formed on my lips as I saw the beautiful bouquet of roses in falling formation with some of the petals falling out of it on the surface of the ivory paper. “Well isn’t that something.” A voice said behind me. I yelped and jumped out of my seat, the sketchbook falling off my lap in the process. I whirled around and a grin broke across my face. And for the first time since this morning, I squealed like a girl. “FIA!!!!” I practically screamed her name. Sofia Torres is practically like a sister to me. She’s always at our house and she also has her own drawer inside our walk-in closet. Nevertheless, she’s also beautiful. Her light brown hair that ended in the middle of her back with her matching full bangs that’s almost up to her eyes make her look like an angel. But with her russet colored eyes that have a crimson red tinge to it that stand out from her creamy white skin, she looks like an innocent girl with a dark secret. She grinned back at me and launched herself into my arms, making the both of us fall on the floor. We giggled loudly and stood up. I brushed the dust off of my clothes while I arranged my ponytail. “How are you?” I asked. I looked up to see her holding my drawing. I instantly started to get embarrassed. I don’t let anyone see my doodle work. I think that it’s too sloppy and not taken seriously. “Wow… This is… amazing, Ally.” A blush slowly made its way up my cheeks. I ducked my head and walked behind her, looking over her shoulder to see my drawing. She turned to look at me with a grin and handed me back my notebook. I kept it in my bag and linked my arms with her. We made our way inside the building while chit-chatting about what we missed in the summer. One thing that I feel extremely guilty about is that Fia doesn’t know what happened with John or with Lucas. She was away for the whole summer with her family, somewhere in Europe. I didn’t tell her anything, but now, she’s here, bringing up John. “So, where’s John?” She asked while I leaned against the locker next to hers. I felt my heart aching and tears brimming my eyes when she brought that up. Even thinking about him made my heart ache. I just bit my lip and looked at my converse that had my silly little cute doodles on both shoes. “Ally, are you with me?” Fia waved a hand in front of my face. “I mean, come on. Where’s you’re charming boyfriend John?” I felt bad. She doesn’t know a thing. Yet here I am; holding back stray tears when I heard the word boyfriend and John in the same sentence. I guess she needs to know that the relationship was long over. I took a deep breathe and opened my mouth to answer her honestly. Fortunately, I was saved by the bell that I many times cursed at. Without another word, I sprinted away from Fia and jogged to my first period. I walked into the door of my English class and found a seat an empty seat in front. I scanned the room first. It’s a routine. Before sitting anywhere in class, scan the room first and see if there are any familiar faces. Sadly, for this class my luck wasn’t working. At the back of the class, occupying the 2 rows, are the jerks and the cheer-diots. And oh, wonderful. There’s little miss popular right there. She’s not only beautiful, she’s also a cheerleader, she’s also popular, she’s also a mean b***h and oh, right, my sworn enemy since the first day of high school freshmen year. At least Scar doesn’t like her too. Oh fish sticks, there’s ex-no. 7. My ex before… well, John. He is the stupidest, jerkiest ego maniac ex I ever had. Ugh. To top it all of, their little puppies are also with them and I don’t have a single friend in this class. Almost all of them are jerks and cheer-diots. I sulked to my seat, hoping that no one will even notice me. I mean, they were laughing and having fun. They were also stupidly loud. But when I pulled out my chair, the noise suddenly stopped and the torture began. “Well, well, well. If it isn’t Steve’s little buddy.” God. This is torture. I hate it that they make fun of my middle name. So what if I have the same name as Blues Clues? At least Blue is seriously cute. She’s also one of my favorite cartoon characters next to SpongeBob (come on, who doesn’t like SpongeBob?). I just ignored them and stifled a sigh. “Yo, Crossworthy.” I bit my lip from groaning in annoyance. They started to sing the Blues Clues theme song with a very off-key tune. Gosh, this is very annoying and irritating. Why can’t I have the stupid unrealistic sixteen wishes on my sixteenth birthday? That would’ve made my life a lot easier. Finally, the door opened. The noise subsided and it was soon followed by the sound of chairs being dragged on the floor. ~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~ I closed my locker and sighed with relief when I made it until lunch. I’ve been dodging Sofia, the jocks and the cheer-diots since that first bell. At least I’ve been pretty successful. I made my way towards the cafeteria and got a tray. “How’s your day?” I turned to look over my shoulder and smiled when Scar stood there with a tray. She was still in her cheer uniform. That reminded me of something. “I thought that there’s going to be an opening ceremony?” I asked her as I took a slice of pepperoni pizza. “Well, Principal Willis is currently unavailable. So they rescheduled the ceremony tomorrow or on Wednesday.” I grabbed a can of coke and waited for Scar to finish. She took a slice of Hawaiian pizza and a can of 7up. We walked towards the tables near the big wide window-walls and sat there. “Then why are you still wearing your uniform?” She sighed and pulled at her skirt. “You know how coach gets.” I jutted out my bottom lip and nodded. “Hey, guys!” Hershey cheerily sat down with us with a bottle of coke, a slice of ham and cheese pizza with one club sandwich. “Whoa… How the hell are you going to fit your uniform after that?” I asked in amazement. To add to that pile of food she’s got, she got out a yummy chocolate bar. And her answer to my question was the usual: ‘so what?’. It’s amazing how she can eat all she wants and not grow fat. No teen has that privilege except her weird body. A little while later while we were busy chatting and such, loud obnoxious laughter of the jocks and the high-pitched giggling of the cheer-diots echoed through the cafeteria. Sheesh, what are they up to now? I looked up and tried to see the jocks up in the 2nd floor of the cafeteria where all the ‘popular’ teens eat. Except for Scar and Hershey of course. “There’s a new transferee.” Fia sat down on the chair with an as-a-matter-of-fact look on her face. “As a matter of fact, he’s hot and super talented. So you can see why he’s already inside the ‘in’ group. No offense pom-pom dancers.” I giggled came out from my mouth and I quickly covered it up with a huge bite of my pizza. I love it how Fia always call Hershey and Scar as pom-pom dancers. “Yeah, he’s hot.” Hershey commented while her cheeks turned slight pink. “I sat beside him in French.” She sighed dreamily before blushing bright scarlet. “He’s also fluent in frigging French!” We all burst out laughing at Hershey’s comment. She always finds guys that are fluent in any foreign language a huge turn on. We continued on teasing Hershey about her newly profound crush on the new guy. I tuned out after a little while and just finished my food silently. But Fia’s words suddenly penetrated through me. My head snapped up and I felt my chest tightening. “What?” I asked. “I said I just saw John after you sprinted off the first bell. And I think he’s avoiding me. Are you two in a fight? You know how that gets. He seems anxious and nervous or something. You should definitely go and see him…” My head was reeling. I wanted to cry, I wanted to scream, I wanted to throw things around, but most of all I wanted to hide in a hole. Why the hell is he back? What does he want here? Didn’t he go to the Philippines last summer and left me behind already? Why the hell is he here again? I shot Scar a look and saw panic in her eyes. She tried to stop Fia from saying anything but it was too late. I heard enough. I got up from my seat and gathered my things. But not before I heard the words that made me freeze. “John!” Scar shot out of her seat and gripped my upper arm. Memories were rushing back to me. I lifted my eyes and came face to face with John. His brown eyes still made my heart beat faster and that smile that makes all girls sigh dreamily. That smile was now fading from his face. He looked taken aback and shocked. “Mina…?” He whispered. I didn’t send another second contemplating on what to do. I slightly titled my head towards Scar and just gasped out. “I have to go…” I sprinted out the cafeteria and into the stupid fields just as the waterworks and the flashbacks started.
He stood there facing the pool at our house. I intended to surprise him by jumping on his back and kissing his neck. But failed miserably. Just as I was about to sneak on him, I heard him talking.
“Mina… I think… Ugh… No, not like that…”
He thumped his phone against his head and groaned.
“Babe… I have something to—No. I feel like an idiot. Ugh…”
After listening for a few more seconds, curiosity got the best of me and I walked up to him with my forehead ceased and a curious look on my face.
“Johnny…” His head snapped up and he faced me. “What’s going on?”
His expression told me to stop. I forced a smile and rubbed the curve of my neck where it meets my shoulder. His face was blank and his eyes were dark. I couldn’t read him like I used to.
“John, what’s wrong? Everything alright?”
He stepped forward and I didn’t know why, but I stepped backward.
“Mina.” He sounded so in pain when he said his pet name for me. “Mina, we’re over.”
“I’m sorry what?” I asked incredulously. I couldn’t believe my ears.
“Almina. I said it’s over. We’re over.” He sounded so cold and distant. Where was the guy I fell in love with?
“Why?” I choked out. I was seriously hyperventilating.
“You’re not right for me. I need my freedom.” I sobbed and hugged myself. “I need to feel free.” I felt something in my chest that I wasn’t familiar with. It hurt too much. I felt like if I move, the ground beneath me would crumble into pieces. “Face it Almina. You’re not right for me. I don’t love you. I just realized that now. I won’t make the same mistake again.” And while his words were registering in my mind, he walked away and left. My chest hurt, my throat hurt, everything hurts. I felt… useless. What did I do wrong?
After he left, his words echoed through my mind while I sobbed and cried.
I won’t make the same mistake again…
Without realizing what I was doing, I was behind a tree, kneeling down while silent tears ran down the side of my face. Going back to that memory brought back a question that still remained unanswered.
“What did I do wrong?” I whispered to myself.
He said that he won’t make the same mistake again. The same mistake of what? Falling in love with me? Or… Lying to me by saying ‘I love you’ when in truth he just doesn’t? He just wasn’t making any sense! Well, up until now he’s not making any sense! He breaks off our relationship, leaves the country without me knowing and comes back after a couple of months! What’s his reason for coming back? What the hell does he want? What did I do wrong?
Yet again, it comes down to that question. What did I do wrong? I bit my lip and pulled out my phone, texted Scar to make an excuse to why I’m missing. After that, I just pulled out my iPod and randomly tapped on a song and put the earphones on. I closed my eyes and what blasted in my ears made me sigh and lean my head against the trunk of the tree, memories rushing back….
I walked towards the pool area and leaned against the picnic table outside. I silently watched the sun setting, wishing that John was here with me. I sighed deeply and turned around to see John there at the doorway with a smile on his face.
His face lit up and he met me halfway. I threw my arms around him and hugged him as hard as I could.
“What are you doing here? I thought you were going to go out of town?”
“Well, I decided to stay.” A smile crept up my face and I led him towards the bench and we sat together while we watched the sun set. We seemed fairly comfortable and very romantic.
“Mina…” He murmured.
“I…” I looked up at him and pulled away slightly to see his face. He looked nervous and kind of serious. I put a hand on his cheek and looked into his brown eyes.
“What is it?” I asked.
His eyes dropped to my lips and my heart flapped like a bird that’s excited for its freedom. His lips slightly parted and he started to lean in closer. My breath caught and I wanted to pull away. I wanted to but his eyes held me in place.
His lips hovered above mine before brushing slightly against it. He then cupped my cheek and pressed his lips against mine. All I knew was that my world was lost. I’m lost. I was melting into the kiss that I didn’t realize that this was my first kiss. I pulled away too soon and I heard a thunder rumbling. I started to walk away. My face was flushed but I knew that my emotions were going wild.
I was supposed to save this for someone I love. But… Don’t I love John?
“Mina!” I looked back and saw John running to catch up with me.
“I’m sorry.” He muttered while he looked at his shoes. It started to drizzle and all I knew was that I needed to tell him something that’s been bugging me.
“Why are you sorry?” I asked. My glasses were all but dry but I ignored it.
“I… I thought that you were saving your first kiss for someone who you loved.” His eyes pierced right through me. By now it was raining. “I just thought that… That you---.”
A loud thunder rumbled, cutting of whatever John was saying. I looked at the sky to see the dark clouds gathering. The thunders started rumbling louder and the rain was pouring harder.
“That I what?!” I shouted.
“That you----” A thunder cut him off again. “---me too!” He shouted back.
I looked at the sky again to see a lightning flashing with a matching thunder.
“What?!” I shouted.
“I LOVE YOU!”
All at once, it became silent. No thunders rumbling, no one speaking, just the sound of the pitter patters of the rain.
I didn’t understand how he could love me. He cupped my face with the both of his hands and pecked my lips.
“I love you.” He repeated. “I don’t care about the others. All I know is that I love you. I love the way you dress, I love your eyes, your hair, your voice. I love your glasses, your personality. I love your flaws and your imperfections. I LOVE YOU. If you don’t believe me then I don’t know how else to convince you.” He sighed and raked a hand on his wet hair. “And if you don’t love me… well, I guess--”
I pressed my lips against his and wrapped my arms around his neck. I pulled back and stared into those gorgeous brown eyes.
“I love you too.”
I watched in delight as his eyes lit up. He spun me around in the rain while he chanted ‘I love you’ a million times.
A few tears slipped down my cheeks and splattered against my shirt. It hurts. It hurts to know that you were fooled by someone you loved so much. Hurts to know that the person you thought you knew and loved was long gone. I felt a hand on my shoulder that made me open my eyes. I stared into a set of brown eyes and I just… stared. I felt hypnotized, like in a trance.
“Are you alright?” A deep voice cut through my mind.
After blinking a couple of times, I knew that I couldn’t see a thing. My eyes were kind of sore from all that crying and my glasses are wet with tears. How very mature of me. I pressed pause and kept my iPod in my bag.
“Uh… Sorry… But can you… Uh…”
Suddenly a warm hand wrapped around my waist and pulled me up. I yelped a bit but held on to the person that’s leading me towards the bleachers. I could make out the green grass and the shining sun. He guided me up the bleachers, slowly taking each step until he stopped and we sat down. I pulled out the elastic band that’s holding my messy hair together and just left it on my wrist. I sighed and cleaned my glasses. The wind blew at us and my hair was whipped behind me, I felt my cool cheeks and I realized quickly how messed up I look. I ducked behind my hair but it was too late to hide my scarlet face. The person who helped me chuckled deeply. I fumbled with my bag to find a tissue or something.
“Here.” I peeked over my shoulder to see the person extending a dark blue handkerchief to me.
A blush crept up my face and I mumbled my thanks. I wiped the tear stains on my face and my very blurred glasses. After I looked presentable, I slipped my glasses on and turned around to scrutinize my unknown helper. I held out my hand and smiled before fully seeing the person. And for what I saw, I was taken aback. He was… well, cute and hot if you might say. He had brown eyes, dark brown hair and this ‘bad boy’ thing to him. With his dark jeans, black shirt and black leather jacket, I think he might be trying to achieve the bad boy look. Well, he is most certainly succeeding. Except the fact that he HELPED me!
“Uh…” I blundered about dumbly.
He flashed me a devious smile and shook my hand. I instantly felt my cheeks warming.
“Almina Crossworthy.” His eyes seemed to glint at the mention of my last name. I’ve never seen his face before. Ever. Like, NEVER.
I couldn’t help but ask, “Are you new here?”
He grinned at that one and laid back on the bleacher.
“Yeah. Just transferred today.”
Well that explains why he’s talking to me and helping me. Wait. He’s a guy. We’re alone. This is not good. I swore to myself to not get involved with any guy. Even if it’s just as friends. I abruptly stood up and faced him squarely, a polite smile on my face.
“Thanks for helping me. I really appreciate it.” He raised a brow and crossed his arms over his chest. “I… Uh… Goodbye.” And without another word, I walked away from him.
Now all I have to do is go back inside, get inside the bathroom, fix myself, wait until the bell rings, go to class, and AVOID JOHN OR ANY OTHER GUY AT ALL COSTS. It should be easy right? I mean, who would take any interest on me?
Chapter 4: “ARE YOU INSANE?!?!?” I winced slightly at my sister’s very loud rhetorical question. I glanced sideways at the bathroom stalls, making sure that no one’s here with me and Scar. “I just--” I explained. “DO YOU EVEN FREAKING KNOW WHAT I HAD TO DO TO COVER FOR YOU?!?!?” She groaned and breathed in and out, trying to calm down her nerves. “Scar.” I told her seriously. “I just couldn’t take it. Stupid backstabbing tears were already splattered on my face when I came out the building. And to top it all, I cried for one whole hour! Sheesh! Oh, and to add to that, I broke the stupid promise I made. Ugh!” And now, Scar just looked incredibly confused. I sighed and brushed my side bangs away from my face. “The promise to not to get involved into… blah, blah, blah…” Her eyes lit up and I instantly regretted having to say it to her. She’ll go girly on me and ask for ‘details’. “Wait, you met a guy?” She leaned closer and grinned. I just grumbled, “Yeah…”, In return. “Hot?” She asked bluntly. I sighed lazily and lifted my shoulders. She groaned and bit her lip. “Name?” Bryce Nelson. His name still echoed in my mind. I faked a ‘thinking deeply’ look and held my necklace in my hand. “Uh… Ben… Boy… Barry… Bryan…. Ah! Bryce!” I nodded, stifling a giggle. “Bryce Nelson.” Her eyes bulged out and her face paled. She leaned against the sink and breathed in and out. Just what I thought, Scar knows everyone. Even the newbie. “He a transferee?” She whispered. I faced the mirror in the bathroom and brushed my hair, trying to untangle the tangles. “Uh, yeah. Never seen him before. He helped me when he found me behind the tree. He seemed fairly sweet but—“ “Devious.” Scar muttered darkly. I turned to look at her with a raised brow while I tied my hair. “You know him?” I asked her. Her head snapped up and I was stunned into silence when I saw them narrowed and filled with anger. But she completely blanked it when she put up her walls. “I mean, no.” She said emotionless. She went to me and her eyes were unreadable. “Just promise me to stay away from him. He’s dangerous.” After that last sentence, she stalked out of the bathroom, leaving me stunned. I wonder what got into her. I pulled my ponytail tighter and just my luck, the elastic band snapped just as the bell rang. ~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~ “Good afternoon class. My name’s Ms. Clarissa Kindley.” The teacher in front of the whole class greeted. “Okay, now I’ll go around and I need you guys to pick a paper in this box and that will be your partner for the rest of the year.” She smiled when she heard groans and such. “Let’s begin.” She roamed around the room, dropping a piece of paper on someone’s table for them to read. But when I realized the sequence, I immediately panicked. Why did I have to have Health class this year? My stomach plummeted to the ground when Ms. Kindley dropped a paper on my table and winked at me. Uh-oh. I have a feeling that this teacher is up to no good—meaning she’s probably trying to do a matchmaking job. Ugh. Just ugh! I hate teachers like that! If they wanted to match make people then why the hell did they become a teacher for crying out loud! Cautiously, I picked up the paper and just stared at it. I couldn’t manage to open it. Please be someone quiet and not interested in making friends… I took a deep breath and was about to open it when Ms. Kindley’s voice rang across the room. “Mr. Puckett, it seems that you’re the only one without a partner.” She grinned and turned to look at me. “Please sit down next to Ms. Crossworthy.” I fumbled with my paper and opened it. Sure enough. MR. PUCKETT. It stated with a wink on the side. Oh my god. Is this teacher insane? I stared in horror at the side note that Ms. Kindley wrote at the bottom of the paper. MR. PUCKETT ;) [NOTE, NOTE, NOTE: HE’S A TRANSFEREE AND HOT. PLUS, SINGLE!] I stifled an eye roll but it came out as an eye twitch. I looked like a freaking crazy person with a twitching eye. I didn’t bother looking at the guy who slid in the seat beside me. I just looked straight ahead while Ms. Kindley discussed about an upcoming project. And that’s all I heard. I bowed my head, for the first time, glad that I didn’t tie my hair. It fell around me, hiding my face. I looked around cautiously before pulling out my iPod and putting the earphones in and hitting play. I also pulled out my notebook and pen and began drawing. When I was about halfway done with the sketch of a cat, a folded piece of paper landed on my notebook. I stifled a groan and kept my iPod. I opened the paper and rolled my eyes. ARE YOU DONE LISTENING TO YOUR IPOD? WE NEED TO START ON THIS REPORT. ----> PUCKETT I faced my unknown seatmate and stared at his forehead and not at his face. “Wait, Savannah?” He said. I gave him my ‘WTF?!?!’ look and brushed the stupid bangs out of my eyes. “No. I’m her sister.” I rolled my eyes again and looked at the board to see what the report was about. Oh god, I don’t have enough time like that! We need visuals, hand-outs, a layout of the report and a good speaker. Oh, yeah, and of course, A TOPIC! And we only have two weeks! “Oh… I didn’t know she has a sister.” He said, clearly shocked. “Of course you don’t.” I took down notes and felt someone staring at me. Peering through my eyelashes, I saw ‘Puckett’ scrutinizing me. And my gosh, was he cute or what! Wait, did I just say that? Dang it! But I couldn’t deny it. He was—is cute. His hair wasn’t really a ‘just-got-out-of-bed’ look, it was just disheveled; Dark brown hair that’s disheveled and a charming smile. I couldn’t see his eyes that much so I don’t know the color. Great, after the John and Bryce incident, I have to deal with this. Great. Just great. “I’m Sloan Puckett.” He suddenly said, holding out a hand. “Call me Sloan.” At least he’s kind of charming and he looked sweet. I eyed his hand and stood straighter. I just quirked an eyebrow at him and looked back and forth to his hand then to his face. He suddenly smirked and leaned back on his seat, letting his hand fall to his side. “Rendered you speechless huh?” Well, so much for charming. Guess he’s just another typical clichéd type of guy. Arrogant. I rolled my eyes again and decided to just focus on the report. “Look, I want to pass this subject alright? So I won’t acknowledge childish games.” I looked at him straight in the eye, noticing that they were blue. S**t. I’m a sucker for blue eyes. “Now, the topic needs to be a disease according to Ms. Kindley. Any suggestions?” But before he could even answer, Ms. Kindley suddenly popped out of behind me and sat on my desk with a stupid misleading smile on her face. “I already have a topic for the both of you.” She said happily. She handed me a yellow scented paper that’s folded into two and walked away. I, yet again, rolled my eyes. HIV. PERFECT! TO KEEP THE STUDENTS INTERESTED IN YOUR REPORT! KEEP IT REAL AND PG-13 PLEASE. NO PDA’S! ;] IF YOU DON’T DO THIS AS YOUR REPORT, I’M AFRAID I’LL HAVE TO DEDUCT A COUPLE OF POINTS TO YOUR SCORE. OH AND ONE MORE THING. I WANT PROOF THAT THE TWO OF YOU WORKED TOGETHER. VIDEO-TAPE IT ALL OR TAKE PICTURES AND SEND IT TO ME. THAT IS ALSO A PART OF YOUR FINAL SCORE. HAVE FUN, KIDDO’S! ~KINDLEY~ I groaned. Is she even qualified to be a teacher? Sloan grabbed the paper away from me and read it. He was laughing by the end. I gritted my teeth and glanced at the clock, only 30 more minutes away from the bell. I faced him squarely and told him that we needed to start now. And that’s exactly what we did. To my surprise, he seemed fairly serious. I thought he was another dumb jock. Huh, guess not. After 20 minutes of gathering information, Ms. Kindley warned the whole class that if there’s no proof of the “working together” part, then 25% of our final grade will be taken out. I groaned loudly and just told Sloan to pick out his part. “Obviously, I’ll be the one reporting it.” He had this weird glint to his eyes when he said it. I just shrugged it off and started taking down important reminders for the report. “Whatever. You do your thing while I do mine.” I looked up to see if he’s listening or not and was blinded by his phone’s flash. “Ugh! What the hell?!” I heard him chuckling but I couldn’t see him. Actually, I couldn’t see a thing! I pulled off my glasses and pressed the heel of both of my hands against my eyes; the flash shocked my uber sensitive eyes a little too much. “Whoa, you okay?” The stupid idiot asked. I lifted my head and almost jumped in relief when I was able to see. But when my eyes focused on a person in front of me, I instantly glared. “Do I look okay?” I hissed. I put on my glasses and glanced around, hoping that no one saw our little innuendo. “You actually look pretty when you have your glasses off.” He complimented. No blush came to my face because I’ve heard that pick up line one to many times. I just rolled my eyes and started shoving my things inside my bag and waited until it was time to go. Thankfully, Sloan didn’t even disturb me for the rest of the time. He seemed to get the message of me not wanting any acquaintances. A minute later, the bell rang and I waited until all of the students are gone and approached Ms. Kindley. “Um, Ms. Kindley?” She looked up from her papers and smiled when she saw me. “Can I help you Ms. Crossworthy?” I bit my lip and contemplated whether I should tell her or not, “I’d like to… work alone on this project.” I blurted out. She didn’t seem surprised by my words. She placed both of her hands on her desk and folded them together. “Ms. Crossworthy, I assure you that Mr. Puckett is a responsible guy. Judging from his grades back at his old school, I can safely say that he is a great competition for you. He might exceed you actually.” She grinned and handed me another yellow scented paper. “Can you be a doll and hand this to Mr. Puckett? Thanks.” She then turned back on her papers. With a defeated sigh, I slipped the paper inside the pocket of my hood and walked out of the classroom.
Chapter 5: Right now, I’m sitting uncomfortably beside my partner who by the way is BRYCE. I kept on fidgeting and stifling sighs because of my sister’s penetrating gaze. Didn’t I mention that my sister is also IN THIS CLASS? Well, yeah, she is. I just don’t know what got to her and made her act this way. She’s usually bubbly and has a smile on her face. But look at her now, glaring and scowling. There was something in her eyes that I couldn’t quite read. “Heeeellooo….!” I turned my head and edged a bit away from Bryce. “Hmmm?” I asked. He grunted and slid his notebook to me. “What’s this?” The page was blank. “That is our supposed to be paper that is due next week.” “So?” I asked carelessly, trying to find out if he actually cares about his grades. “So?” He asks incredulously. “This paper is about HISTORY. I don’t know about you but I want to pass this subject. I can’t afford to fail History.” I was quite stunned by his remark. He never struck me as a person that actually cares for his studies. He looks like a rebel. Well, you can’t judge a book by its cover. “And what have you been doing the past 30 minutes and 10 seconds?” He snatched the notebook that was on my table and stared at it in awe. “Wow, this is… good.” I just roll my eyes and try to snatch back my doodle notebook and failed miserably. He was just too tall. “Give it back you stupid mutt.” I hissed at him. He just rolled his eyes and tucked it inside his leather jacket. “Nope. Not until we have something to work on.” I just rolled my eyes and placed a hand on my hip. “I already have a something to work on.” I held out my hand and sighed. “Please give it back.” “If you have, then what is it?” He asked with a raised eyebrow. I swear, this guy is killing me. I flipped the pages of my notebook to the right page and showed it to him. He looked a tad bit confused. He wrinkled his nose as he fully understood it. “Philippine History?” He asked with an unbelieving tone to his voice. “Yep.” I grinned at him and tried to get my notebook that was now placed on the table under his arm. “And what do you know about it?” He’s such an ass. Let me put his ego in its proper place then. “I know enough.” I shrugged. He rolled his eyes and opened his mouth to speak, but I wasn’t done yet. “In fact, I know lots about that. I know that American Liberation Forces landed in… Uh… L-Ley-Leyte, yeah, Leyte in Oct. 20, 1944 and that the Japanese soldiers who were taking control of the Philippines back then surrendered to the Americans who were helping out the Filipinos in Sept. 2, 1945. And I also know that the Filipino and American Forces entered Manila in Dec. 23, 1945 and here’s an extra thing that I know because of that history, World War II in Europe ended in May 7, 1945. Oh, and of course--” A hand clamped on my mouth and Bryce looked as lost as hell. I stifled a laugh but once he removed his hand from my mouth, I smirked evilly. He rolled his eyes and slumped against his seat. “Okay! You’re the one with all the information.” He crossed his arms over his chest. “But I still want to at least help out on this paper. We still have two weeks.” Yet again, he surprised me. Most of the partners I had over the years would jump in joy because I was willing to do all of the work by myself and they still would have good grades because of it. But here he is right now, the most unsuspected person. He really looks like a rebel and of course, rebels are just like people who would jump at any chance of not doing any work. How bizarre. “Wait, you’re sure?” He grinned and grabbed my notebook and started copying my notes. “Are you serious?” I ask again. This time, he laughs and glances at me before resuming his copying. “I take it you’ve never been helped before in a paper?” He suddenly asked. I just stared at him and after a few seconds, shrugged. “I just don’t like help. Well, except for reports.” He just shook his head and the bell rang. “Since, the bell rang just in time; I will take my notebook back to my house and start working on the paper. You can finalize it when I return it to you.” He snorted and put his things in his bag—along with my doodle notebook. He faced me and laughed at my horror struck face. I knew where this was going: Blackmail. “Don’t worry. You’re precious notebook will be kept safe.” He patted my shoulder and casually walked away, but not before pausing and looking at me over his shoulder. “If you want it back, go to the fields later and look for the guy in black.” ~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~ Sulking towards my locker to get my things for final period, which was Art Class (finally, something I enjoy!), I saw a couple of jocks standing beside my locker. And worse, Sloan’s leaning against it! I held my breath and steeled myself for the worst. “Hey! It’s Blues Clues again!” And the torture begins. I glanced up to see Ms. Popular’s boyfriend grinning from ear to ear. I hate that guy. He’s the best friend of ex no. 7. “Aw, don’t be like that Blue.” He mocked. “I’ll call Steve if you want.” They laughed like it’s the end of the world. It is. It’s the end of MY world. “Nice one Justin!” Yes. Justin is his name. Justin Vang. More like VAIN actually. He thinks the world would crumble if he died or something. I. Hate. Him. “Blue? Why Blue?” And there goes Sloan. A lot of snickering erupted while I moved to open my locker. Sloan seemed to get the picture and moved away from it. “Since your new here, we will enlighten you with our sexy Savannah’s outcast sister.” Justin walked over to Sloan and slung an arm over his shoulders and gestured to me. “This here is Almina BLUE Crossworthy.” I pulled out my phone when I felt it vibrating. “As you can see, she does not have any curves or something that we, guys,” Guffaws started behind me. “can enjoy.” I bit my lip from cussing at Justin and just opened the message that Scar sent. BLUE, I HAVE CHEER PRACTICE TODAY UNTIL 5:30. CAN YOU STAY? YOU CAN STAY AT THE ROOFTOP. I’LL JUST GET YOU THERE WHEN WE’RE DONE. PLEASE? ++SCAR++ I texted her back to tell her I’ll stay and did what I needed to do and closed my locker. Justin continued on blathering non sense false stories about me to Sloan. And what’s worse is that Sloan seemed to believe him. His eyes would widen and his face would be contorted with disgust. I didn’t bother to think about how to explain to him that all those things that Justin and his ‘posse’ told about me weren’t true. At least he won’t bother me anymore. The bell rang, making the students scatter and separate. I moved my shoulders lightly in a form of a small shrug and turned on my heels to get to my art class. But from the silence of the hallways and the way it manages to turn light footsteps in to an echoing one, I managed to overhear one statement that made my jaw drop. “…Sleeps with every guy that she’s dated… Might look like a nerd but she’s a wild one!” I wanted to turn around and slap that a-hole of a Justin. And for the first time in my life, I wanted to stay in the corner and just spy on them—you know, cut classes. And you know what? That’s exactly… What I did not do. I’m such a coward. I can’t even stand up to myself. Ugh.