they say forgiveness is key.
i don't see it.
where's the lock that opens
with your pathetic "it's okay"?
it's not okay. i know because
you can't even look me in my
eyes or mutter a goodbye as
you close your locker and
walk away, each step another
drop of salt in this open
wounded heart.

i don't know what to say
anymore, and it's funny,
because i'm supposed to be
good with my words...right?

i still don't know whether to
believe anything that's happened
because fantasy is hard to differ
while i try to grasp onto the
reality that things won't ever
be the same.

you told me that things heal with
time...but it's been weeks, and
my apology is stuck somewhere
between AP books and the sour
taste of my name shoved in your
throat.

i know i signed myself up for this
and i'm supposed to let go of the
shattered goodbyes but each night
i cling onto the bittersweet sound
of an "i love you" rolling off the
tip of your tongue.

i'm starting to see things in black
and white with the absence of
your sparks, and i lay here:
vulnerable heart against pen...
pen against paper, as i write the
apology that you'll never read.