There's this hidden feeling
Deep inside of me
And I try to keep it hidden,
Try to tamp it down,
Grind it into the dust,
But it's a lonely forgotten feeling
Forgotten but remembered
And as much as I try
to be happy,
to keep smiling,
to have joy,
This burning, aching feeling
Engulfs my heart again
And pulls me into the shadow,
The depths of my black, murky soul,
Where even the demons wouldn't go,
even the demons wouldn't go
Tiptoeing down in the pit,
Where longing reaches out
And wraps around your very core,
Leaving behind scum
Tainting your heart
Until you back is hunched,
And with a heavy heart you smile,
go on living,

pretending,

acting,


lying,
As if there wasn't a film
Dimming your light
Until the sunshine fades,
Your starlight winks out,
and you cease to exist...
But people still see you,
Like residual light in the sky,
They're seeing into the past
Like stars that've died
Except you don't go out in glory
no flash,
no flame,

no passion,
there was no supernova when I left.
No explosion scattering pieces of me,
The good memories,
influencing people for good.
I just faded,
there and then non,
No one to miss me,
No one realizes
What's happening
There's just a mask here,
a frame,
a cutout,

an outline
Made in white chalk
outlining the body that's left behind
after the soul
-the essence-
faded
shriveling up into nothing,
covered in a film
of sadness,
depression,
hopelessness,
No one notices,
therefore no one to help,
People just walk by
Engrossed in their life,
To busy to notice,
To see the invisible
The sun that faded
The one who is no more
Who was once so happy
So bright,
and optimistic,

and cheerful,
But no more
She's just a shell,
Waiting for the spark
To shock her back to life,
To bring pink back to her cheeks,
To lift her strings
and give her a purpose.
But until then she sits
empty,
dusty,

hollow,
Forever staring,
but not seeing.
Just a shell
with her light extinguished,
waiting,
waiting,

waiting,
To be filled with purpose
and to once more,
shine.