Star-Crossed | Teen Ink

Star-Crossed

June 19, 2013
By ZeroDarkFlirty BRONZE, Eastvale, California
ZeroDarkFlirty BRONZE, Eastvale, California
3 articles 0 photos 15 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The strength of the pack is the wolf
And the strength of the wolf is the pack."
-Rudyard Kipling


I met you
One December morning
The sky was gray
And the rain was pouring
But this day would be far from boring

Our eyes met
On that fateful day
And when they did
I couldn't turn away
So nervous, all I said was "hey"

Your eyes lit up,
An adorable smile
I'd try to impress you,
But all the while
You were seeing us walking down the aisle

So when it came:
The night of the dance
When you first asked me
To take your hand
I knew this could be my one chance

I remember your touch;
It felt like a serenade
Our hearts both burst
Like hand grenades
Is this a dream, or is it fate?

A soft silk dress
Colored baby blue
Things like these
Remind me of you
But these days, they haunt me true

For after that night
With trembling lips
You tried to say something
But you never did
Who knew it would've been our first kiss?

And then next week
One day, you disappeared
I searched for you everywhere
I searched far and near
Never thought I'd live without you here

You called that night
Around nine fifteen
My nightmare seemed over
I knew it could become a dream
When I saw your picture on the screen

You spoke first,
You called, "Hello?"
I asked, "Where'd you go?
I miss you so."
But there was something I didn't know:

Your flight was soaring
Two miles above
All of our dreams
Everything we loved
At first I thought I just wasn't good enough

But you had to tell me
Some withheld truth
It started with "I"
And it ended with "you"
Someone tell me this isn't true

My first love
Was flying today
On a one-way flight
To far-away
I'd give everything for you to stay

After everything
We did together
How could our bond
Ever be severed?
Seems nothing can last forever

Because times have changed
And you have, too
It's been a year
Since I've heard from you
Days go by with nothing I can do

So now I wait
Next to a silent phone
Waiting for your voice
When you hear my own
So I can know I'm not alone

But if your voice,
That bittersweet melody
Says, "Hey, you,
Come back to me."
I swear, I'll swim across the sea

I'll run across
The Midwest Plains
I'll run through snow,
Fire, ice, and rain
Just to be with you for a day

I imagine it now
Me reaching you
When I reach your home
Just past Malibu
The sweetest case of deja-vu

A baby blue dress
And jet-black hair
The feeling of joy
Just fills the air
Like fulfillment of our prayers

Because for you, I ran
Three thousand miles
Through the Everglades
Through every trial
Just to see one little smile

And now it's come
The time is true
To say four words
That I forgot to;

"Alanna, I love you."


The author's comments:
A poem I wrote for a childhood sweetheart of mine. She moved away last year, and I wrote this in her absence. I know I'll never be able to give it to her, but I keep it in the hopes that we may one day meet again.

Notes: The rhyme pattern is ABCBB, if you're wondering. The last line of each stanza is longer on purpose.

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This article has 7 comments.


on Jul. 30 2013 at 10:36 pm
LexusMarie PLATINUM, Las Cruces, New Mexico
27 articles 0 photos 423 comments

Favorite Quote:
The more control you have over yourself, the less control others have over you.

Hey hey hey! I feel it's been ages since I last read your work! I hope that all is well where you are! (Can I say it again? I love your username.) This was really sincere! The emotion was absolutely clear! Everything felt so very real.. with a poem like this someone's heart you could steal! Okay, haha, I don't know why I just rhymed all that. Anyways, like I said, this was genius. I loved the length, most of the time people complain when poems are long, but I personally love them and have begun writing longer poems. I love finding symbols in writing and the fact that you used December was brilliant, since in writing it stands for sadness and whatnot. I really liked the rhyme count. Each stanza was something new while still being consistent on the subject. It was beautifully written. I think you did a wonderful job, Zero. And I hope that one day you'll be able to give this poem to Alanna. Talk to you later:)

on Jul. 17 2013 at 1:37 pm
sophistryxo SILVER, St. Louis, Missouri
5 articles 0 photos 32 comments

Favorite Quote:
“There was nowhere to go but everywhere, so just keep on rolling under the stars.”
-Jack Kerouac

This is so lovely and sweet! But at the same time so sad :( this is quite beautifully written! Great job!

Hanban12 ELITE said...
on Jul. 11 2013 at 10:19 pm
Hanban12 ELITE, Lake Worth, Florida
133 articles 7 photos 631 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put foundations under them."
Henry David Thoreau

"I fell in love the way you fall asleep; slowly, and then all at once."
John Green

This poem is so sweet and heart-wrenching. You really showcase your longing and leave it undeniabley vulnerbale yet powerful. The rhyme scheme seems perfect for a love poem, since its light, bittersweet, and captivating. It sets up a catchy rythym that sticks in the reader's mind like honey and never lets go. I love poetry that tells a story of prose yet contains the figurtive language of a poem. Wonderful imagery is strategically placed so the reader can imagine an object clearly in their mind. Once again, amazing job, and I cant wait to read more of your unique, creative pieces! :)

on Jul. 6 2013 at 4:58 pm
TheCapturedBat GOLD, Belen, New Mexico
12 articles 0 photos 88 comments

Favorite Quote:
If all else perished and he remained, I should still continue to be; and if all else remained, and he were annihilated, the universe would turn to a mighty stranger.
-- Emily Bronte, Wuthering Heights

This made me think of someone I love dearly. We're separated by more than physical distance. This is a lovely, affectionate poem. I hope that someday your sweetheart will read it.

bree_bree GOLD said...
on Jul. 3 2013 at 1:51 pm
bree_bree GOLD, Auburn, Kentucky
12 articles 0 photos 39 comments

Favorite Quote:
mistakes are made to be learned from.

I love this peice its verry, bittersweet, for me its like the story of my life. anywayz amazing work  and i am adding it to my fav list XD

on Jun. 30 2013 at 8:23 pm
Laugh-it-Out PLATINUM, Brooklyn, New York, New York
38 articles 0 photos 445 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Do not go gentle into that good night. Rage, rage against the dying of the light" --Dylan Thomas

Awwwwwww this is too cute and super sweet!! I really liked it though i felt some of the transitions didnt flow very well, but the last few stanzas were grey! So were the opening ones. U think towards theists it became hard to follow and maybe you could have left those out, but overall i thought it was great :) keep rockin Zero

on Jun. 27 2013 at 8:00 pm
Myvoice4change SILVER, Other, Other
9 articles 3 photos 164 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Everything will be ok in the end. If it's not okay, it's not the end."

This is a good use of free style. It makes me picture what the author is feeling.