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Nice Knowing You
Don’t talk to me, just leave me alone
And quit harassing me over the phone
If you continue and fail to leave me
Then I’ll show you how sorry you’ll be
I think you must have a really puny brain
Scratch that, I honestly think you’re insane
Not only did you and your friends egg my house
But on the doorstep you left the corpse of a mouse
So after you left I devised a plan
I will get you back. I know I can
So I came to your house in the dead of night
With ropes and a gag I tied you up tight
I had my weapon of choice, hiding in my bag
As I pulled you to the forest I let your feet drag
This is my favorite part, it made the kidnap better
When I showed the gun and your pants got wetter
It’s got boring when you began tearfully begging me
So I used my firearm and set a few projectiles free
I’m really glad I videoed the whole thing
At school I’ll show it, oh the joy it will bring!
For you see the weapon I shot with was great fun
Because it was nothing more than a paintball gun
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