T’was the shop before Christmas
And all had gone mad
The frenzy of spending
Turned gents into cads
I’d left from my home
With a wave and a smile
My folly was shown
“I’ll be back in a while”
As I got to the shops
My jaw hit the ground
The shelves were stripped empty
No food to be found
Like vultures the people
Stole from other trolleys
Defenders fought back
With handbags and brolleys
Carols and bells
Had got lost in the din
The crowd was so large
I could barely fit in
I’d only popped out
For a white loaf of bread
Now sugar plums thrown
Smacked me right in the head
I went to the car park
I now would escape
Ignoring the shoppers
Who all turned to gape
“Now Dasher, now Dancer, now Prancer and Vixen
On Comet, on Cupid, on Donner and Blitzen
To the top of the store
To the top of the wall
Now dash away, dash away, dash away all!”
Later I thought of the crowds, empty shelves
But I still needed bread, so instead I sent elves!