I have this constant war in my mind pulling me back to the darkness of my thoughts, must be crazy. Muisc is my only escape from the memories of the past, maybe not even bad ones; but I would rather not think at all then think of the times I was happy cause in a way its more painful then the pain I feel now. Emptyness is my company, obssessed with the thought of lonleyness, the feeling of numbness settled in my chest slowly to the point of bitter cold, it take more than a fire to break its barriers. I learned to trust no one on this journey, no one really cares who you are so why take the time to explain. Gossip originates in yourself after a while you learn to let it fade out and ignore people, slowly you will fade away like the rest. Maybe its my destiny ti become silent cause silence consumes me, the quit surrounds me like a heavy blanket on a cold winters day. You never really know what you have til it's gone and you've lost everything. People ask why I do what I do but why explain to people who have a father's love, they don't understand what its like to try to find love in a boy you think you deserve, putting trust in someone you barley know to feel loved. I'm a girl who had many dreams til a series of realities and challenges came in the way. I have this great eagerness to find love and freedom its scary in ways leading me many different roads to a broken heart.