The Grief of Aging | Teen Ink

The Grief of Aging

November 20, 2013
By Kkern22 SILVER, Defiance, Ohio
Kkern22 SILVER, Defiance, Ohio
8 articles 0 photos 0 comments

My grandfather is a strong man, not just physically but mentally, too. In recent years he has needed help with the activities he can’t do anymore. Last winter my grandfather told me something I will never forget. I helped him with a basic outside chore that he couldn’t do himself. On our way back in, he stopped and turned to me and said, “I’m getting old. I used to be able to do everything by myself with no help, but now, I can’t do hardly anything. I hate living like this, where I can’t do anything but sit on my butt and watch others doing what I should. I feel almost useless nowadays.” Hearing those words would upset any grandchild, and it definitely left me heartbroken. My heart thumped faster and faster, and my palms were getting sweaty. Not knowing what to say or do killed me.

Grandfathers are role models to many, especially younger kids. Grandma and Grandpa’s house seems like the ideal place for almost any kid. It’s the thought of love, cookies, and being spoiled that makes kids look up to their grandparents. Some favor their grandma, but as for me, I look up to my grandfather as a great strong role model. When I was a kid, it seemed my grandfather was invincible as Superman. He could and would do anything he set his mind to. As the years have gone by, so has some of his invincibility, and his kryptonite, age, has set in. After the strokes, heart attacks, and back surgeries, he was left with little physical strength, but nothing will triumph over his will to keep preceding with what makes him who he is.

My grandfather, Farrell, was born and grew up in West Virginia. Unfortunately, he never really knew his real father, and this taught him to grow up strong and self-willed. As a teenager, he moved here to Defiance, Ohio, where he finished his childhood and lived from then on. He spent his adulthood working at Diehl’s as a supervisor, a position he took seriously. This became his life and his joy, but he had to give it up when retired at the age of sixty-three. From the day he left to the present, he has always missed his work, and till this day he still sees old employees who remember him and miss him. Those little moments help to keep him going. For about seven years after retirement, he still appeared to have a big deal of life in him, but the past five have been hard on him. One of his passions was to fix and maintain anything he could find that needed it. Some other passions of his were to take care of his acres of yard, work on cars, and to find a use for any of the hundreds of random tools he keeps hung up in the garage. Although my grandfather, Farrell, loved all of his passions immensely, his biggest passion of all was to do anything for his grandkids, and he taught us life skills. I wish I could say he could still do everything that made him happy, but I can’t. Nevertheless, he tries to push his limitations to the max.

Seeing my role model in a state that I see mine is a very difficult situation to witness. About twice a week, I go over to see him and my grandmother both, and each time I see him struggling with basic functions. Because of his strokes, it’s hard for him to stand up let alone walk far distances. He now uses a cane, which helps, but he refuses to use it many times. Easy activities for us are some of the most difficult for him. For example, he can’t make his own food anymore, drive, mow the lawn, etc. One time during the summer after moving the green John Deer tractor from the garage, he couldn’t move his legs enough to hop off the tractor. He sat there trying and trying to will his legs to move off the tractor. I came outside, and he yelled, “Hey, come help me!” After I helped him, we went inside, and he told me, “I was stuck on the tractor for about twenty minutes trying just to get off,” which saddened me.

My grandfather is someone I look up to, and he will always be my role model no matter what. Except for the recent events, he has had a great life so far, and his whole life experience has made him very wise. Even though he can’t do what he used to, I will always look up to him as a strong man. We’ve talked to each other about growing old. It bothers him so much, but he keeps on going no matter what. It hurts for me to see him this way, but at least he is enjoying the rest of his wonderful life. He loves all of his passions, but the most important one of all is to take care of his grandchildren. Farrell, my grandfather, showed all of his grandkids how to fix cars, build, and swim, but best of all, he taught me how to be a man.



Similar Articles

JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 0 comments.