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A Day of Remembrance
Waking up, May 31st, today was the day. I am going to share my essay with over 100 people in my community. I am terrified but I was chosen to do this for a reason. It is time to go, oh no, I thought to myself. My heart was beating so fast almost like it was about to explode. I walked out the door and the shiny sun beamed on my face. I was walking down to the green, nervous and weak as ever. Finally, I arrived there. I don’t know how I’m gonna do this.
Moist, bright, green grass I walked through. Step by step my stomach twisted even more. Creak, creak, creak. I heard as I went up each step to the gazebo. I turn around and I see the immense crowd ready to listen. All eyes were staring up at me as if I was a celebrity just arriving from Hollywood. Claps and screams made me feel sour and all I wanted to do was run and keep going. I can’t do this, I thought to myself. But there was no going back now.
Crinkling the smooth paper in my hand and almost crushing it. I could taste the hot and salty sweat as if I was at the beach swimming in the ocean. It was dripping down from my forehead. I was shaking so much. I hate talking in front of people. A big fear of mine and it kept following me like it was my shadow. I was unable to overcome it. I was the only person sharing this story so all the attention was gonna be on me. I got this but I can’t mess up. Ugh that’s not gonna help me do well. The mic to share my speech was handed over to me. It was my time, how was I possibly going to do this. Those thoughts wouldn’t leave my brain almost like they were locked in a jail cell and had no way of escaping.
The cold and heavy microphone was now in my sweaty palm and all eyes were staring directly at me. I’d never been this nervous before. What if I mess up? What if I make a fool of myself? What if I get lost when I’m reading? Stay calm, you’ve got this, I thought to myself trying to calm down. Town members and neighbors were all gathered in bunches ready to hear my speech.“What is Memorial Day?” I started to read and everyone was quiet as a mouse. The smell of fresh air surrounded me and it felt like it was caving in on me. Almost done, just keep going. I'm still a nervous wreck, shaking uncontrollably.
On and on I went reading, I couldn’t even hear a mumble, I was so focused on doing well. “This is a day dedicated to remembrance,” I read aloud. I look from my paper to see the crowd all applauding. Oh my gosh, I did it. I read my essay to everyone and didn’t mess up. I take it in again, the blue sky, the warm, bright sun, and all these people happy to hear what I had just shared. Why was I so nervous? That wasn’t bad at all. I just need to have more confidence going in the next time that happens. My mom, teacher, and others all come to talk to me and congratulate me on how I did. I was as joyful as a kid in a candy store. At last, I felt extraordinary. I did it.
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This piece is about my personal experience of being very worried about speaking in front of people and my ways of getting through it.