A woman’s place is in the home. This old adage, as with many old traditions like segregation and making children work in their family’s fields (or better yet, factories!), really makes sense when you stop and think about it. Regrettably, our “modern” society has strayed from this time-honored ideal. Women are working more jobs, more hours per week, and even making up to eighty cents per every dollar a man makes! This is simply not ok. We must return to the old ways because as we all know, ideals of the past are the best ideals. We must get back to these ways, which is why I have come up with a proposal. I propose that women never leave their homes; since this is their rightful place, and where they are truly the most useful, this is where they will spend their lives.
To start, when a baby girl is born, she will be born in her home. Male babies, of course, will still be born in hospitals. This only makes sense, as all doctors will be men, and they will know best how to deliver a boy. The few women who are somehow skilled enough to become a midwife or nurse will be far better suited to deliver baby girls in their homes. What about the women giving birth to boys? you might ask. Why can they leave their homes? Well, the birth of a boy is a momentous occasion; a member of the dominant sex is being born. This is special enough that a woman is allowed to leave her home for this event.

From this point on, little girls will spend a majority of their lives in their house. They have no need for school, as their primary purpose in life will be to cook, clean, and eventually be a good housewife for their future husband and children. So that is what the girls will learn. From the age of two onwards, they will begin helping their mothers with simple chores around the house such as vacuuming, dusting, and cleaning up after the men of the household. We all know “boys will be boys”, and they cannot be expected to clean up after themselves. They have sports to play, homework to do, and jobs to prepare for when they are older; they cannot be bothered to cook, clean, or really do anything for themselves. So, these tasks fall to the girls, who are much better suited for them anyway.

Girls, as they transition into young ladies, must be pretty in order to attract a future husband and to later fulfill their purpose of being a good wife and mother. Staying in the house also helps them in this endeavor. They are not exposed to much sunlight, providing them a perfect porcelain complexion. There is also plenty of time for them, when not working around the house, to either ask their mothers or look online for makeup and fashion tips. Of course, all girls must know basic sewing skills, but those especially skilled in the craft may even decide to make their own clothing on occasion, for themselves or for family members. This is a fun, healthy way for them to express their creativity without doing anything too wild like trying to get a job or distracting hobby.

When women become married adults, their household duties only multiply. They will undoubtedly have at least two little ones to look after because what woman doesn’t want a big happy household full of kids? Those who before may have questioned if women get bored spending all their time at home can now be assured that a grown woman is never bored; with both a husband and children to look after, she hardly has any downtime. What a busy, fun life!

Throughout the rest of their lives, women are kept busy (and usually in some stage of pregnancy) by cooking three square meals a day, making sure the house always looks pristine, and teaching their young daughters how to do the same, so the cycle can continue on flawlessly.

Only by returning to this way of women keeping their place in the home can we continue as a society. The issues of a “wage gap”, “gender equality”, and “feminism” will be things of the past. Without all that arguing and uproar over such silly little things, society will be a vastly better, simpler place. For when half of the population is confined to the indoors, their voices stifled, why wouldn’t things be nicer? I maintain that my proposition is the only way to live: with women in the house.