Mason Heart. Oh how that name irritates me, who cares if it is my name? It seems that everything nowadays irritates me. My classmates, teachers, and technology! Yep, I did just say technology. Who knew this small absurd device called a cell-phone would cause so much annoyance. I guess that is why the makers of this pesky device decided to make a power button. So I can shut down the world of Barbie’s, hypocrites, liars, and fakes trying to get to me. Yeah, I know that sounds harsh but hey at least I am being honest. They are weird here. I guess they do not care about personality, just looks. I am about 6’1”. My hair is straight up black and it is just down to my eyebrows. My eyes are green but it is the dimples that get the girls to ignore the fact that I do not want them around me, ugh girls! No matter how mean I am to them they still will not leave me alone.

I’m a junior at Lincoln High School. Our school is named after the, oh so honest one, imagine that? I live with my father Cole; my mom went AWOL when she got fed up with him not being around. Women these days, do they not know a man has got to do what a man has got to do? We cannot always be around whenever you all have a tiny little problem that can be easily solved. I do not know what this world has come to, but everyone is so vulnerable and most do not like to be alone. I, on the other hand, love to be alone. Especially because I can be with my own thoughts and not someone else’s voice talking about a broken fake nail or a new boyfriend. Chicks are weird. Oh great, speaking of the she-devils here comes one, Lily Rose.

“Hey Mason, how are you today?” she asks me.

“Well, Lily, I was having a fantastic time before you came along.”
Lily is the worst kind of woman out there because she acts as if she is so caring and loving towards everyone. What a bunch of lies.

“Seriously Mason, when are you going to grow up?”
When am I going to grow up she asks, well what does she know? I’m more grown up than all the other yahoos in town.

“When are you going to leave?”

“Mason I was just trying to have a friendly conversation.”

“Why don’t you go have a friendly conversation elsewhere?” As I say this I get up and just walk away from her.
Honestly, that woman does not know when to stop. Why can’t she just go take a hike in the mountains rather than go out of her ways to bug me? Girls are all evil.

I wish I could just forget everything and let go. I see guys just hanging around talking about a game of some sort. I wish I could be just as laid back as they are. “Mason.” I heard my name in a whispered voice. I turn slowly towards the voice and I see her, Lily Rose. Does she not give up?

“What do you want now?” I ask through gritted teeth.

“Mason, do not be so cold-hearted. I know what happened between you and your mother; I figured it out the other day.”
My body instantly flinches and I know my eyes are flashing with anger.

“You know nothing, Lily, NOTHING, so if I were you I would just shut your pretty little mouth and walk away now.”
She is just standing there looking at me with those light grey eyes of hers with pity. I hate pity. Then she says something that shocks me.

“I am your neighbor, Mason. When we were younger I used to stay up all night crying with you. I never knew what was happening, I knew you were hurting and I thought there was nothing I could do for you. I saw the way your mom was with you. You always flinched when she got to close to you with a cigarette. We were eight. I never knew what was happening. I also saw how your mom always needed your father around and, when he was not she looked lost. I had a feeling that when she looked lost well she took it out on you. I saw the scars from the burns on your back the other day while you were throwing out the trash. I now realize why at night, when we were supposed to be sleeping, you were screaming those deafening screams. I know why you act indifferent towards girls now. I have never tried to hurt you. I always wanted to befriend you. I wanted you to trust me Mason.”

I cannot believe what she has said. I am so shocked; I do not know what to say. I feel numb right now. I have nothing to say to her. I feel myself just standing there staring at her, as if she is an alien. All the memories are rushing in my mind and I remember my Mothers last words to me.

“Mason sweetie, I will never hurt you again, trust me.”
I never saw my Mother again. I guess in a way she kept her promise. “Trust me….trust me…..trust me…” I am in a trance with those words repeating in my head. That for a moment I forgot Lily was in my presence.

I see her, though, taking small steps slowly towards me. Then she is right there just, a few paper sheets away. She then puts her arms around me. I can’t think. I am feeling suffocated. I abruptly shake her arms off me turn around and run away from her. I run home. I lock myself in my room and I just sit on my bed thinking about how much Lily knew. Could it be possible that she cares? I do not know. I decided to just blast some music so the sound can drown out these thoughts of mine. However, the song “Therapy” by All Time Low came on and the lyrics of the song ended up making me think even more.

“My ship went down in a sea of sound when I woke up alone; I had everything a handful of moments I wished I could change and a tongue like a nightmare that cut like a blade.” After my mom left, all she left me were moments and memories I wish to forget. I was not always this “cold hearted,” as Lily likes to put it. It’s just that after you go through so much you change, sometimes not for the better. I wish I could change. Lily makes me want to change now. I’m sorry, Lily. I come off mean and I say things that will hurt you. I’m not good, never will be.

“A handful of moments, I wished I could change, but I was carried away give me therapy, I’m a walking travesty.” That is all I am, a walking travesty. Not everyone around me is a fake as I claim them to be. I am the one who is not being real.

“Therapy, you were never a friend to me, you can choke on your misery.” Nothing I do helps. The closest thing to help is my hatred. I will always be miserable, mom, and it is all because of you. Therapy, you were never a friend to me, but maybe Lily can be. Maybe I can give her the chance. Maybe that is what we both need, or maybe it is I that needs to give myself the chance. Great, I’m going crazy having conversations with myself in my head.

I will give myself the chance to let go of the past. I need to move on, but I will need help from the one and only Lily Rose. I decide to give her a call but realize I don’t have her number. So, I just walked to her house instead. She is my neighbor, after all. I feel nervous. Why in the world am I nervous? I am never nervous! I knock on the door with two knocks. Then, the door opens and a police officer opens the door and just walks out. I stand in the Rose’s doorway just standing awkwardly. Then, I see Mrs. Rose panicking and crying to Mr. Rose.

“Mrs. Rose! What happened, what is going on? I ask her barging into her house. I see Mrs. Rose turn towards me with fear and with a little bit of shock in her face as she sees me.


“Oh Mason its Lily we cannot find her anywhere! She hasn’t been answering her phone. Oh, my sweet Lily is missing. The cops can’t do anything about this either, since it has not been twenty-four hours. ”
What... I’m confused I just saw her like two seconds ago. Ok maybe two hours, but still, she has to be okay.

“I have to go look for her.” I say frantically.
I run towards the door and tell the Roses to let me know if they find anything out. “Lily!!” I shout her name as I run to the park where I last saw her. “LILY!!” I have to find her, the woman who made her mark on my heart. I have to find her. I run around the park until I hit something or someone.

“Oh I’m sorr… Lily! Oh my God, you are okay, you’re here, you’re really here!” I can’t believe how happy I am that she is okay. “Where were you, Lily, your parents and I were so worried! Why didn’t you answer your phone?” I say to her in a now hushed voice.
“Oh, I was just helping a young child who scraped his knee pretty bad. Wait, you were worried about me?” Well this woman sure catches on quick.

“Err, no I wasn’t worried about you. I just didn’t want to hear your parents crying for you late at night.”
As I said that I saw her face change from happiness to disappointment. Ugh, why did I say that? I’m a dummy.

“Lily I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to say that. It’s a habit. I’m trying to change myself, but it will take time. I’m just asking for you to bear with me and forgive me when I say things that are out of line.”
I see her face go blank, and then I see her smile a real smile that quickly turns into a smirk.

“Apology accepted Mason I guess I will see you around… friend?”
With that she walks away. Friends, I like the sound of that.