Out of Control | Teen Ink

Out of Control MAG

By Anonymous

   Many guys today are suffering from severe problems resulting from overexposure to carsand games," says head of Car and Video Game Control Unit (CVGCU) RaePercival. The CVGCU believes things will improve if the cause of the problem isremoved, and so production of new video games will be halted for the timebeing.

The production cut is due in part to an overwhelming number ofprotesting women outside factories. Their cries of "Save Our Boys" havebeen heard nonstop for the past week at one local plant. Some protesters evenstarted throwing video games at employees and burning magazines.

Christine Joseph, head of research at CVGCU, stated, "Men are notmature enough to be allowed such items. Until they learn, there will be no newvideo games or cars."

Recent studies by the CVGCU, created threeyears ago by the government, show that boys who are devoted to cars and videogames are more likely to have unsuccessful relationships, blindness and dreadfulspeech problems.

Recently, a poll revealed that 89 percent of femalescomplain about the number of new cars released and the incredible number ofcar-oriented video games on the market. The 65.3% increase in new cars and videogames on the market has made the number of young couples drop from 81% to 63%.

Hope Windsor had this comment: "I was lucky because I was able tobreak my boyfriend of any habit before it became a real problem. Some of myfriends, however, have not been as fortunate. For them, going out on a Saturdaymeans going to, like, their boyfriend's best friend's house to play a new videogame or look at cars."

Research by well-known boy-dilemma doctor ErikJonathan, M.D. proved that males between the ages of 14 and 21 have a brainfrequency that processes coherent thoughts about video games approximately every12.35 seconds. That is roughly four times every minute. Young men, on average,show brain activity dealing with cars every 5.68 seconds. That is a whopping10.56 times every minute.

This is uncalled for, according to girls,especially since research also indicates that their boyfriends think of them onlyeight times per minute. Most girls feel that for a relationship to be successful,the boy must think of her about 15.87 times every minute (about every 3.78seconds).

Girls interviewed commented that constant video game playing andcar discussions have caused boys to lose focus on what's important ... literally.Many young males are nearly blind. The only objects they can see clearly arelarge TV screens with moving objects and cars with an internal combustion engine.The constant staring at the screen during video game playing, and thewater-repelling paint on today's cars, have caused their eyes not to be able tohandle different amounts of light reflected at anything more than a 65-degreeangle. Boy Blindness by Cars and Video Games (BBBCVG) has made even the mostbeautiful of girlfriends feel as if they are not checked out enough. Most youngmales do not comprehend the ramifications of this blindness.

BBBCVG isnot the only harm caused by video games and cars. People everywhere have noticedthat many young males have horrific speech. When a young man is playing a videogame, talking about cars or even racing cars, he is believed to become almost apart of the environment in which he has surrounded himself. Most males arecompetitive and scream and curse at almost everything. Thus, it is no greatsurprise that when they return to society, language from their"virtual" or "car" world comes with them.

Yesterday,police arrested two men involved in a verbal fight over who had the more powerfulcar. One young man involved, AJ Markson, commented, "It's critical who hasthe best car. You can't go through life with a slow, crappy car. You need power,that's what's really important."

The other young man involved said,"Markson thinks he's so great and has the greatest car. My old jalopy is farsuperior to his BMW. I'd beat him any day."

Young women feel theresearch done by the CVGCU is helping to improve the effects video games and carshave on young males, but say that there is still much to do.






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i love this !