Every December 4th, social media feeds fill with everyone’s Spotify Wrapped summarizing the musical listening habits of each user, including total minutes listened and the top 5 artists in colorful slideshows that can be reposted to all social media. From the abstract violet and ebony mosaics of each post, one pair of artists persists in people’s top 5s with a mysteriously solemn aesthetic. Billie Eilish and Finneas O’Connell’s songs “L’amour de ma vie” and “Wildflower” from their album Hit Me Hard and Soft exemplify the universal struggle with grief, through genre-blending composition and awe-inspiring vocals, although with limited lyrical variation. 

Released in 2024, Hit Me Hard and Soft flourished, with all its songs hitting top 40 on the Billboard Hot Top 100 (Zellner). “L’amour de ma vie” recounts a vivid story of Billie’s emotional tumult during and after a breakup. “Wildflower” exhibits the melancholy and complex process of moving on as she consoles someone else grieving the loss of a relationship. The common theme of grief and depression comes from Billie’s personal experiences, as mental health issues have troubled her ever since she was thirteen (Foy). 

“L’amour de ma vie’s” jazzy track transitions smoothly into a fast-paced electropop, blending genres that mimic the gradual change from grief to elation. In the first track, the jazzy electric guitar in the background swings and relaxes the ambiance, accompanied by a slow-moving ballad. This mix mimics the emotionally volatile state of one in depression, as one could be happy one moment, but sad the other. The second track, however, races forward in a fast-rhythmed electropop that consists of synths and bass. Towards the end of the verse, the phrase “It's over now” repeats four times throughout 30 seconds. This lyric vocalizes the ideal release from depression, but the repetition signifies relapsing. The rhythm in combination with lyrics mimics the mood swings and the eventual recovery from such anguish. 

In the first track of “L’amour de ma vie,” Billie’s vocal fry and falsetto singing technique, paired with the soft cries/vibrato, amplifies the expression of suffering. This style mimics the weariness and sadness of depressed people who are so caught up in their thoughts. Additionally, her lamenting tone evokes the feeling of struggle, as her memory continues to haunt her. Her soft voice implies the inner thoughts of those suffering, who are often barred from speaking up. 

“Wildflower” skillfully blends an intimate ukulele and slow-tempo drums to create a blended genre of “soft rock” while also illustrating the grief of destroyed love. The ukulele isn’t commonly used in rock music, as the guitar would normally prevail. Billie made this artistic choice of the ukulele because of its brighter sound, which makes it stand out more from the drums. The constant strumming of the ukulele illuminates the motif of heartstrings, which lifts above the heartbeat of the drum’s increasing volume. The strings of one’s deepest love were broken by betrayal, as repeated in the chorus: “But every time you touch me, I just wonder how she felt.” Emphasizing the betrayal, the climactic crescendo of the drum and ukulele signifies the increasing devastation in her heart. With these choices, Billie presents to the listener what it truly feels like to be utterly despondent. 

In the chorus of the song, Billie’s glissando and vocal fry intensify the sadness in this song. Her voice evokes crying, as if her voice and heart are both breaking, and she is barely able to speak. However, she also expresses the overwhelming inner emotions of suffering and grief. The built-up anger caused by the struggle is expelled during the high-volume section of the chorus. Within this section, Billie adds in glissandos (rapid slides up and down the music scale), expressing sudden mood swings from rapid fury to profound depression. Accompanied by vocal fry (relaxing of one’s vocal cords to create low-frequency vibrations), Billie articulates the fatigue felt during periods of depression. These artistic choices effectively immerse the listener. 

Despite the immersion, her lyrics are limited to the same topics of grief, loss, and moving on. This may lead to a sense of monotony for some listeners, diminishing interest. However, these two songs still vary drastically in musical composition and style. 

Billie Eilish and Finneas O'Connell’s Hit Me Hard and Soft masterfully blends genres to pair with her captivating vocals that convey the pervasive struggle with grief. However, Billie also promises the eventual death of our grief, vocalizing that the agony is “over now.” Through her signature mysterious aesthetic, she encompasses the tumultuous battle against deception and heartbreak. 

Works Cited

Eilish, Billie. “L’amour de ma vie,” Hit Me Hard and Soft, Interscope Records, 2024.

Eilish, Billie. “Wildflower,” Hit Me Hard and Soft, Interscope Records, 2024.

Foy, Chris. “Billie Eilish Discusses Her Views Depression & Mental Health.” FHE Health, 28 

Aug. 2024, fherehab.com/learning/billie-eilish-depression-mental-health-

struggles/#:~:text=According%20to%20an%20article%20about,parents%20until%20she
%20was%2010.  Accessed 4 March 2025.

Zellner, Xander. “All 10 Songs from Billie Eilish’s ‘Hit Me Hard and Soft’ Debut in Hot 100’s \

Top 40.” Billboard, Billboard, 28 May 2024, billboard.com/music/chart-

beat/billie-eilish-hit-me-hard-and-soft-all-songs-hot-100-top-40-1235694294/. Accessed 

4 March 2025