“Everything i had to live for, dead.” “Why couldn’t i be dead?” This is Pattyn Scarlet Von Stratten, a 16 year old girl whose life was never normal but will never be the same. She was a kind, innocent, and a humble young girl that only wanted love and acceptance from her family. She was sent to Caliente, Nevada with her aunt over the summer and got everything she wanted until it all came crashing down. This book will have you shocked, sad and it will leave you more with a mysterious hook and make you want to read part two.    

In this book Pattyn shows a lot of courage and generosity. She is a mormon and lives in a unloving, abusive home with 7 siblings. Her father is an alcoholic and her mother doesn't care for her children. Each day she was living a life she never desired. Soon she meets a boy, she never had a boyfriend and he ended up putting her in extremely hard positions. She had become rebellious by not acting on her, “Women’s role.” Once she got caught up her father had enough of her rebellious actions and sent her with her aunt over the summer.  

  “ The creepy thing is i won’t even miss them, either;” she thought to herself. Overtime she started to fall in love with Caliente. Pattyn and aunt J gained an unbreakable bond. She taught her how to drive, ride horses, love, passion, dedication and forgiveness. She had been granted all the secrets about her family and finally realized the misconception her father sees with her aunt and her. As time went on she met her soulmate, “Ethan.” it was love at first sight. She was afraid to love him because, what happened in the past and she knew her father would kill him. They did everything together, they had so much love for each other she gave him the only thing left she could give.    Summer was just about over and she had to go back home. A place she hated but, missed a little bit. Aunt J had become like a mother to Pattyn and she always had her no matter what. When she came back her father had been abusing Pattyn’s sister, “Jackie.” Pattyn was back to her old life and since she came back her father had been abusing her. Pattyn soon finds out she’s pregnant and Ethan asked to marry her. Soon they were on the run to have a new life. It all came crashing down. The two closest things Pattyn had were gone, Dead. It was all because of her father. Ever since then Pattyn has been Plotting for revenge against her father. I highly recommend this book to young adults and mature readers only. I think people should read it since a lot of people go through abuse and depression. This is a big eye-opener to people who are going through any kind of abuse.