Okay fine, you caught me in a lie
When I said I hated u and I wished u would die
But I’m afraid to say what I know you already see
Because you’re able to see past my shield, and look at the real me

I’m terrified of your touch,
Your look, your voice
Because every time I see you
I start to lose the choice

Of hating you versus loving you
Because to hate you is to hard
And loving you is too easy,
so my heart I’m trying to guard

That’s why I spew those awful words
Like lava on a garden of love
And I pray to God you’ll stay away
with one hard shove

But you keep coming back
and I don’t understand why
I’m in a battle with my heart
and I’m just trying to survive

And my love for you is eating me alive
I guess this is the time where I have to decide

Whether it’s worth the risk
to fall in love and possibly be destroyed
or to keep my heart protected
but to always have a void

And I’ve decided today
to never open my heart
because losing you would hurt too much
and I just can’t risk falling apart