Losing You | Teen Ink

Losing You

February 17, 2016
By midnightmetanoia PLATINUM, Gaithersburg, Maryland
midnightmetanoia PLATINUM, Gaithersburg, Maryland
39 articles 0 photos 12 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Soon madness has worn you down. It&rsquo;s easier to do what it says than argue. In this way, it takes over your mind. You no longer know where it ends and you begin. You believe anything it says. You do what it tells you, no matter how extreme or absurd. If it says you&rsquo;re worthless, you agree. You plead for it to stop. You promise to behave. You are on your knees before it, and it laughs.&quot; <br /> &mdash; Marya Hornbacher


I guess I lost you around the time I lost my mind and to be completely honest I don’t know which was more painful.
I don’t know which is worse waking up wishing that I were dead or knowing you won’t be there to tell me you were glad I’m not.
I don’t know which is harder feeling like a stranger in my own body or looking at you and not recognizing the person you’ve become.
I don’t know which hurt me more that day the blade I dragged across my skin or our final messages glowing in little letters on my phone.
I don’t know which it was that pushed me into the darkness and sent me down this endless spiral of self hate.
What I do know is this: in the end it won’t matter which one killed me
all that matters is that it did.



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