Some days I feel like I'm the main character

for a story that's future will not be happily ever after.
As the story goes on
I'm slowly losing myself.
But I am not the main character with a tragic backstory
And the last page of my tale
Will be burned
Along with the rest of the pages
That make up my life.

But the future is unknown
and just like all the books go
a plot twist of gargantuan proportions is coming.
No one can tell
if they are going to Hell
or if they are the Angel in someone's becoming.
They find that they can't find
and they hide what they can't hide
and they finally lose themselves to another.
It's not love or money
or even them running
It's the connection to the reader who feels like their brother.

But what if the book is written by an author
like Veronica Roth.
Who could simply kill off the main character
and have that be the end of it.

A life is a reflection
of one person's thoughts
or a whole bunch of people
telling you who you are or not.
Only you are in charge
and you write your story.
You get to choose if it be
one of sadness or glory.
Things happen in the plot
that the character can't see.
But it doesn't stop them
from knowing how it can be.

Every story must come to an end
Some sooner than others
I'm just tired of fearing
My last page

When some readers get into books
they don't have a care how the character looks.
They don't see the end and they can't feel your pain.
But to some of them the pain feels insane.
Their insides grow cold and their body, it shakes.
They smell the anxiety and depression it makes.
Good readers and friends get scared for the girl.
Some think of the end and feel like they'll hurl.
They want the character to be alright.
They don't want to see her go down without fight.
Some even throw the book in frustration
when they know it's too late and they can't stop the occasion.
It hurts the readers too, to see characters go.
And only the writer can know what they know.