K, phew :)

No, I appreciate your criticism. It is entirely welcome and I thank you so much for taking the time to check out my work. To begin, I do feel the true meaning of the poem was misunderstood. It was written to have a double meaning. On the surface it is a poem about a lustful relationship but what I was truely getting after was an individual lusting after success. Success being personified as "Him." Now that is a topic which speaks to me and I knew writing this was going to be a gamble when it came to other's interpretations of the piece. Thank you again.

Okay, I always feel bad criticizing, so I'm going to start with the good: You CAN WRITE. Seriously, I can always tell when somebody can write. Not from how much I liked an article/poem but from the writing style. Your poem flowed beautifully, the rhythm was perfect, it was all so good. My criticism is that it didn't touch me. I think when people write about subjects they really know about, it affects the person who reads them. I don't know you, so perhaps you HAVE been in a relationship like the one described in the poem, but I personally didn't feel it.

Again, please don't take this harshly, I love the flow and you should be proud of yourself- you're a great writer.