Alone | Teen Ink

Alone

May 19, 2013
By Brittany-NamedTheFluffMastahNumber2 GOLD, Milford, Connecticut
Brittany-NamedTheFluffMastahNumber2 GOLD, Milford, Connecticut
15 articles 0 photos 69 comments

Favorite Quote:
The person that you'd take a bullet for is behind the trigger.
(song)
Miss Missing You - Fall Out Boy (:


I don't wanna be alone
Sitting by a broken piano
Watching the rain come down out of my window
Waiting for you to come home

I don't wanna have to stay up all night
Always knowing there is no point
Constantly staring into the night
Hoping I'll see your headlights

I'm probably going to find out again
You left me for my friend
If that's the case, you should just go
Then I'd be happier alone



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This article has 10 comments.


on Jun. 3 2013 at 3:50 am
LittleLadybird GOLD, Carrickfergus, Other
14 articles 0 photos 48 comments

Favorite Quote:
To be nobody but yourself in a world that is trying it's hardest every night and day to change you into everyone else is to fight the hardest battle a human being can fight, and never stop fighting.

Aw!! :( really sad, you make us feel really bad for the speaker and that isn't easy to do! Great poem :)

on Jun. 3 2013 at 3:45 am
CookieMonster24 PLATINUM, Delhi, Other
25 articles 2 photos 147 comments
I have to say, You have done a great job! I want you to keep writing. I look forward to reading more of your stuff. <3

on Jun. 1 2013 at 7:04 pm
Brittany-NamedTheFluffMastahNumber2 GOLD, Milford, Connecticut
15 articles 0 photos 69 comments

Favorite Quote:
The person that you'd take a bullet for is behind the trigger.
(song)
Miss Missing You - Fall Out Boy (:

thank u for the advice. i tried rhyming this but it didnt quite work haha. i appreciate your feedback :)

on Jun. 1 2013 at 7:02 pm
Kit-Kait BRONZE, Amherst, Virginia
1 article 0 photos 54 comments
This was lovely! Though I was a tad bit disappointed that the only rhyme was in the middle. I see no other structure...but this was good! Truly! Please keep writing. Thank you for writing this.

on May. 31 2013 at 5:44 am
Brittany-NamedTheFluffMastahNumber2 GOLD, Milford, Connecticut
15 articles 0 photos 69 comments

Favorite Quote:
The person that you'd take a bullet for is behind the trigger.
(song)
Miss Missing You - Fall Out Boy (:

thank you sooo much :)  i'll look at it :)

on May. 30 2013 at 6:11 pm
Sissybug2012 PLATINUM, Union, Missouri
36 articles 0 photos 128 comments

Favorite Quote:
"the greatest thing you'll ever learn, is just to love and be loved in return." -MOULIN ROUGE (song lyrics)

oh gosh thats so sad. but very touching. you should check out my poem "paranoia".

on May. 28 2013 at 2:43 pm
Brittany-NamedTheFluffMastahNumber2 GOLD, Milford, Connecticut
15 articles 0 photos 69 comments

Favorite Quote:
The person that you'd take a bullet for is behind the trigger.
(song)
Miss Missing You - Fall Out Boy (:

Thank you so much :) i appreciate the feedback

on May. 28 2013 at 2:41 pm
Fallen_ PLATINUM, Quakertown, Pennsylvania
25 articles 3 photos 433 comments

Favorite Quote:
" a shattered world is only an opening into a new beginning with laughs, smiles, and love all around enter the world of the light and away from the broken darkness"

This is so sad, but amazing i like the last stanza the best and the flow and rythem was perfection so keep it up cause this was amazing

on May. 27 2013 at 10:43 pm
Brittany-NamedTheFluffMastahNumber2 GOLD, Milford, Connecticut
15 articles 0 photos 69 comments

Favorite Quote:
The person that you'd take a bullet for is behind the trigger.
(song)
Miss Missing You - Fall Out Boy (:

thank you so much :)

on May. 27 2013 at 3:23 am
LiraDaeris PLATINUM, Tucson, Arizona
22 articles 0 photos 135 comments

Favorite Quote:
“You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself any direction you choose. You're on your own. And you know what you know. And YOU are the one who'll decide where to go...”
― Dr. Seuss, Oh, the Places You'll Go!

How sad! I feel for the speaker. The main crinkles in this were rhythm blurches and inconsistent rhyme schemes. Iron those out and voila! In all honesty, it was a lovely poem. I like the scene you set up with the piano and waiting for the person. Gives a clear picture of the waiting and self-expression for and towards the beloved.