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Nights
Even with melatonin I’m awake in three hours
I wake with a jumping start
I have to calm my rapid heart
And soon my thoughts are racing in
Some days they’re about my future
Some days they’re about my past
In the end I fall back asleep only to be tortured
Nightmares worse than reality have me tossing and turning
When I wake a second time I don’t know where I am
A sudden paranoia scares me into tears
Whoever was in my nightmare is sitting at the foot of my bed
I calm enough to realize it’s just one of my book bags
My mind is again left idle
And so I begin to think
I try to latch on to the positive ones
But my hands slip from the cold numb
As my thoughts carry me
I blink back a few tears.
I’m alone when they finally fall.
I’m alone with all my fears.
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