Watching you leave like you always do.
some days you say you’ll stay ,
that’s only until we start arguing.
Blaming me for your misfortunes,
Threatening to quit something you’ve worked so hard for.
All for me you say.
Deep down you know it’s too late, but you tell yourself it could never be.
One too many boyfriends you’ve chosen over me.
One too many arguments,
you say you hate me.
Trying to justify what you do is right.
You need a life too,
You’ve sacrificed so much,
You’d die for me.
Why do i find that so hard to believe.
You wonder why when you’re home you feel alone.
You’ve isolated yourself from everyone but him .
Apologies are empty
Just like your love.
You give it all to him .
Now you’re all used up .
What about the children mom,
what about your kids ?
Too tired to cook , too tired to clean .
Don’t you see he’s draining you .
What are you so afraid of ?
You were supposed to save us,
Save us from our broken lives.
Now your oldest is comforted by failure and your youngest by intoxicated lies.
Neither of them are happy.
And you dare to wonder why.
Maybe if you loved them enough
They wouldn’t every night cry .
Convince yourself you tried your hardest.
Surround yourself with lies.
Maybe they will be there for you ,
When the selfishness leads to abandonment.
You were the best mom in the world, nurturing and all .
Now you stand here by these graves,
Wallowing in love and deceit,
Grieving over a double suicide.