why wont you mend my heart | Teen Ink

why wont you mend my heart

March 29, 2010
By Hexenbiest SILVER, Winona, Ohio
Hexenbiest SILVER, Winona, Ohio
5 articles 0 photos 8 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Hope is the worst of evils, for it prolongs the torments of man."
"You don't really understand human nature unless you know why a child on a merry-go-round will wave at his parents every time around -- and why his parents will always wave back."
Life is a game, play it....Life is too precious, do not destroy it."
"Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn."

why wont you mend my heart after you broke it in two
why wont you end the never ending silence even though its going through and though
their is a reason why i cant say your the one, the reason is because im scared
i am scared to let anyone in, to let my guard down because i will feel bared
im sorry i cannot say it ,i wont because you just proved that you arent,

The author's comments:
i felt this way after i got my heart broken because i wouldnt say i love you

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This article has 5 comments.

on Dec. 17 2011 at 8:09 pm
CarrieAnn13 GOLD, Goodsoil, Other
12 articles 10 photos 1646 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by." --Douglas Adams

"The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority, but to escape finding oneself in the ranks of the insane." --Marcus Aurelius

This is a really emotional poem, but I have a bit of criticism.

1.  Your grammar.  'their' instead of 'there', no apostrophes, no punctuation, no proper capitalization...I know this is a free verse poem, but that really annoys me.

2.  I think shorter lines and maybe splitting this up into verses would really help its appearance and rhythm.

Other than that, great work!

on Aug. 19 2011 at 10:43 am
Mudder_Hacky SILVER, Fowlerville, Michigan
8 articles 0 photos 85 comments
btw, nice picture choice (: heck, even just nice picture...

on Aug. 19 2011 at 10:42 am
Mudder_Hacky SILVER, Fowlerville, Michigan
8 articles 0 photos 85 comments
aw, don't say you got your heart broken. that makes it sound like u think it's your fault.. and my guess is that it's not. Not wanting to say "I love you" prematurely is not at all a bad thing; in fact, it's completely understandable...

on Sep. 23 2010 at 9:22 am
SilentSerenity BRONZE, Brookfield, Ohio
3 articles 1 photo 19 comments

Favorite Quote:
"A word to the wise isn't nessesary, its the stupid ones that need the advice."
Bill Cosby

Very nice poem, i hope you write more, MyFallenAngel.

on May. 24 2010 at 8:22 am
HeatherBee BRONZE, I Live In, Texas
1 article 0 photos 1979 comments

Favorite Quote:
Go on and try to tear me down. I will be rising from the ground, like a skyscraper

Love is louder than the pressure to be perfect

awww, well u wrote a greatt poem. its beautiful