The most beautiful room I had ever seen

Warm, generous people filled the space with life

Yellow lights and laughter 

Groups of people conversing and gathering on couches

Sitting close, almost on top of each other, out of choice

The stage brightly lit as people stepped up and prepared their instruments

Then they started playing

They played and they sung
And I felt more connected than I have in a long time

All equals in one room there just to enjoy the experience of being alive and young

Friends swayed together I almost saw their souls tied through their fingertips 

I almost watched the bright colors of the music flow into ears one by one

I almost watched hearts light through chests as people held their friends tighter

I held myself tighter 

Is this what I'm missing

Strums of guitars and bangs of drums echoing songs I listen to alone

Is this what I could have had

Will I regret it will I ever be this happy

Am I doomed from today till forever is it already over

Is this the moment I step onto the stage with my crown out of branches

Will my friends find me in my room tomorrow morning and stand on desks out of justice

Or will I accept I can't do the play and live forever someone else’s journey

Hiding from the room never to feel souls conjoined through fingers

Doomed to hold myself tighter