I try to break free

I try to fake smile

When I do something easy

I end up feeling vile

People say I'm faking

People say its not that bad

But they dont know what I'm going through

and comments like that make me mad

I'm sorry if I cancel our plans

I'm not trying to be mean

But I just cant do it

So I huddle up like a bean

I feel so cold

I feel so bad

I hurt your feelings

That makes me sad

I really want to see you!

I do really I do

But I cant because of a feeling

That makes me feel so blue

I swear I have a curse

A deep feeling to make me feel small

I feel forgotten like a penny at the bottom of a purse

I hate this but I love you all

This curse haunts me

No matter what I do!

It wont let me free

and these words I write are true