I tried to change myself for you

and be everything you liked

to a point where I couldn't recognize even myself anymore

i've spent all this time wondering where you've gone

why you left me

the calendar's flipping pages, and it's been a year 

but i'm still sitting at our spot, waiting for you to appear

i've tried everything i can, but you're still out of reach

how far i run, you're still miles farther

maybe if i turn around and run back to a time we were together

linking hands with one another, walking along the beach in the upmost weather

i could stay there and remind myself of when you loved me and promised me forever

times where i was happy and i could tell you whatever

but you took it with you

and our spot is nearly abandoned 

and the beach is cold and doesn't feel the same 

and every time i hold hands with someone, it's like i'm holding you

but it's been so long, by now i don't even remember what they feel like

not a clue

i miss what we had, but i sometimes regret you

you took everything from me

not even my own self is someone i can hold onto

so what is that i'm grieving for

     when it is myself that i mourn.