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You Gave Me My Nickname
My ears bleed from the silent screams that echo from the void that expands from my lungs
My heart shatters from the lashings that your tongue gifts to my mind
My mind melts and scrunches itself to try to decipher these codes of touch that you lay upon me
Does it mean that I am accepted?
Does it mean that I am finally normal?
Every time that you would gaze into my soul from across this hell
Was every time that I would question if this is what I was doomed to be
As my mind tried to think of what it could mean
What did you see me as?
What was I to you?
Did I matter?
Did I feel?
Did I make you feel?
When I think of you
I think of other people
The ones who had deemed me certain terms
Robot
Alien
Machine
I felt like this was what I was
But every time that your eyes meet mine
I’m reminded for the first time that
If I’m feeling something
No matter how faint
It might just mean
That you were able to destroy the armor that I came in
All nice and neatly packaged in my box
With just another fake mandatory smile plastered across my face
But you didn’t just want to make me into another doll
You made me brave
Brave enough to graze my fingertips along the surface of the countertops
Brave enough to leave my gray streaks of thought on the ceiling
Brave enough
To perhaps one day
Be a person
Perhaps even the one that you glimpsed hiding behind the curtain of my mind
The first time that you said ¨hi¨
The first time that you saved my life
Over and over again
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