As I Slowly Grow More Numb | Teen Ink

As I Slowly Grow More Numb

May 20, 2014
By GingerMonk PLATINUM, Lowell, Michigan
GingerMonk PLATINUM, Lowell, Michigan
20 articles 0 photos 11 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;I became insane with long intervals of horrible sanity...&quot;<br /> -Edgar Allen Poe


They've found me
Curled up in the corner
I was always meant to be
A broken, shattered loner

No one's ever shown me love
Even my life was an accident
Ripped from above
Into a life without precedent

They tried to end my life
Before I came out of the womb
He refused to take her as his wife
So my future she tried to consume

To her dismay, I didn't die
I held tight to life
I never meant to make her cry
Or to cause her painful strife

So she gave me to another
A family meant to care
But this secondary mother
Did nothing but beat and scare

Taken from her hold
I was thrown into a place
Where no one had been told
They were not a sad disgrace

That's what we believed ourselves to be
Locked inside this "home"
Our own value we couldn't see
We felt so all alone

We held onto each other
The closest thing I've felt to love
One young man who became my brother
Until he decided he'd had enough

He left our torturous prison
Unable to take me too
His time for freedom had arisen
Before he left he said, "I love you"

Part of me believed
And the pain welled up inside
So often I'd been deceived
That most of me thought he'd lied

Once again I was alone
Left all to myself
Forever to atone
While I sit upon the shelf

Labeled "lost but never found"
For no one wants to find
A girl still left uncrowned
And so sadly blind

The scars upon my wrists
Tell the tale of what I've seen
How I've tried to find Death's kiss
But even Death won't kiss me

So instead I lie in bed
Waiting for a hero to come
Wishing I were dead
As I slowly grow more numb


The author's comments:
Oddly enough, I was having a very good day when I wrote this. This is arguably the most depressing work I've ever written, but is also one of the most detailed and expressive. It is definitely one of my favorites.

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