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Lovely Words

August 7, 2012
By Sparrow GOLD, Englewood, Tennessee
More by this author
Sparrow GOLD, Englewood, Tennessee
16 articles 5 photos 6 comments

Favorite Quote:
Painting is poetry that is seen rather than felt, and poetry is painting that is felt rather than seen.
- Leonardo da Vinci

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we never knew what we got into
hanging onto our tiny thread
taking in our last precious breath
there was nothing left we could do
while keeping hold of our embrace
and I caressed your gentle face
you spoke the words I still hold on to
as you said them like a sweet lullaby
I cried the more you looked me in the eye
you said it will always be just us two
I'll always love you and never let go
you have my heart and it beats so slow
because you calm it with each "I love you"
that voice so soft sent chills up my spine
I'll always be glad that you are mine
because I love you and you love me too

© Nicole B., Newcastle, WA

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This article has 4 comments.

Sparrow GOLD said...
on Jan. 16 2013 at 3:34 pm
Sparrow GOLD, Englewood, Tennessee
16 articles 5 photos 6 comments

Favorite Quote:
Painting is poetry that is seen rather than felt, and poetry is painting that is felt rather than seen.
- Leonardo da Vinci

View profile
no hate. i can always use opinions :)
Rolledthestone SILVER said...
on Jan. 16 2013 at 11:41 am
Rolledthestone SILVER, Nowhere, Other
8 articles 0 photos 108 comments

Favorite Quote:
"You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye." (Matthew 7:5) and "All the poeple who supported slavery were free, all the people who support abortion live..."

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Could work on the title and a bit on the originality. I always like an capturing and original title but this feels a bit too much like poetry I've read before. Try to think of something that plays on words a bit, double meanings you know. Just constructive critisism, don't hate plz.
Sparrow GOLD said...
on Aug. 7 2012 at 6:23 pm
Sparrow GOLD, Englewood, Tennessee
16 articles 5 photos 6 comments

Favorite Quote:
Painting is poetry that is seen rather than felt, and poetry is painting that is felt rather than seen.
- Leonardo da Vinci

View profile
thanks so much :)
DanielM SILVER said...
on Aug. 7 2012 at 6:21 pm
DanielM SILVER, Kent, Washington
6 articles 1 photo 245 comments

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"People take love like its a four letter word or just a phrase that you tell people or your friends all the time. But in reality love is much bigger than a merely phrase or 4 letter word. Instead love is a genuine promise or covenant to that special person."-Daniel Mathia

“Why change yourself when you were made perfect and wonderfully by the creator of everything?” – Daniel Mathia

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I like your poem. I like how it flows. Great emotion. I also like your ending. And your word choice is good