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I Want to Kill Myself MAG

February 15, 2012
By SamanthaFaulkner GOLD, Romulus, Michigan
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SamanthaFaulkner GOLD, Romulus, Michigan
16 articles 0 photos 2 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Love to faults is always blind, always is to joy inclined. Lawless, winged, and unconfined, and breaks all chains from every mind."

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I want to kill myself
In an unexpected way.
Murder all the badness
But let the nice things stay.

Assassinate the hate
That's buried in my heart.
Rid myself of evil
To let the goodness start.

I'll slaughter all the judgment
That's darkening my mind.
Massacre revulsion
That makes my spirit blind.

Slay all of the pride
That's commandeered my soul.
Open up my head
And let the love unroll.

I do not wish to die,
Please, don't get me wrong,
I'll just cast away the demons
To a Hell where they belong.

'Cause when burdened with the issue
Of whom I wish to be,
I want people to look back
With pleasant memories of me.

© Kelsie W., Lubbock, TX

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This article has 13 comments.

TabithaL SILVER said...
on Jul. 9 2015 at 9:16 pm
TabithaL SILVER, Suffolk, Virginia
9 articles 0 photos 16 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Speak only if it improves upon the silence"- Mahatma Gandhi

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Aw, this was very sad. I got goosebumps, though. It was very well written, and the rhyme scheme flowed smoothly. Great job! I look forward to reading more of your work!
cynthiaibrahim GOLD said...
on Jun. 23 2015 at 2:04 pm
cynthiaibrahim GOLD, Corona, California
14 articles 0 photos 3 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Learn the rules like a pro so you can break them like an artist." -Pablo Picasso

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Beautiful meaning.
Sarelle PLATINUM said...
on Nov. 14 2014 at 1:59 pm
Sarelle PLATINUM, Winslow, Maine
21 articles 3 photos 24 comments

Favorite Quote:
Dream like you will live forever,<br /> Live like you will die tomorrow.

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I can barely say anything but amazing.
Charlize_Marie GOLD said...
on Jun. 27 2013 at 5:35 pm
Charlize_Marie GOLD, Goose Creek, South Carolina
13 articles 0 photos 8 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.&quot; Hebrews 11:1

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I think that rhyming isn't very effective in poetry, however, your use of rhyming didn't bother me too much. I love how you make this heavy sounding topic feel so light to the reader's mind as it is read. This isn't about suicide, but about wanting to be happy and that isn't heard of too often.
theatregirl PLATINUM said...
on Dec. 28 2012 at 10:46 pm
theatregirl PLATINUM, Lathrup Village, Michigan
30 articles 12 photos 209 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;To thine own self be true,&quot; -from Hamlet, a play by Shakespeare.<br /> &quot;I have sworn on the altar of god eternal hostility against all forms of tyranny over the mind of man.&quot; - Thomas Jefferson

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This really good. Not only is it good, it capture the feeling most teens have felt :the urge to not necessarily die, but to escape from the burden of life and the expectations and criticism of others. Many people, including me, can relate to your poem.Congrats on your publication and, as all ways keep writing !
Syberian9 said...
on May. 31 2012 at 8:36 pm
Syberian9, Highland Mills, New York
0 articles 0 photos 1 comment
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Wow....this is really good! The way you twisted the meaning of killing yourself......so creative!!!!!!!!
Nicole67 PLATINUM said...
on May. 31 2012 at 2:15 pm
Nicole67 PLATINUM, Indianola, Washington
25 articles 0 photos 30 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Someday, someone will walk into your life and make you realize why it never worked out with anyone else.&quot;<br /> &quot;we often put up walls not to keep people out, but to see who cares to get through&quot;<br /> &ldquo;Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don&#039;t matter, and those who matter don&#039;t mind.&rdquo;

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That's deep. AMAZING!! Congrats on the publication. :)
Kenziemcm13 PLATINUM said...
on May. 31 2012 at 1:29 am
Kenziemcm13 PLATINUM, Rutherfordton, North Carolina
36 articles 5 photos 38 comments

Favorite Quote:
A simple story can tell an entire story!~~ ME<br /> Pictures tell a 1000 words~IDK :P

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I like it! Its deep and very true! Lovee it!! You can really write I enjoyed it! Can you check out a free of mine? Perhaps? Tell me what you think of them I would be honored if you looked at some of my work! :)
Juicy said...
on May. 30 2012 at 9:46 am
Wow! Very well written, got me thinking about how this world would be if all of us would do this to ourselves! Phenominal! keep writing :)
Shnitzal-Face SILVER said...
on Apr. 27 2012 at 1:53 pm
Shnitzal-Face SILVER, Pflugerville, Texas
5 articles 0 photos 23 comments

Favorite Quote:
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Deffinetly a 5 out of 5. A poem that is read and not understood can probably be the sweetest poem there is. This one is a poem of beauty. I'll never find another to compare with this one...keep writing, a poet that is able to write like this about such a shadowed subject is very gifted.
Itsbeenalongday SILVER said...
on Apr. 24 2012 at 2:09 pm
Itsbeenalongday SILVER, Hendersonville, North Carolina
7 articles 0 photos 27 comments

Favorite Quote:
The Time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time!

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Wow I love this Soo true instead of one of those morbid poems about contemplating suicide I got a breath of fresh air hahaha. Oh please do read my Poem " The day I iwent to the Ballet" Its in this section with editors choice as well! Its got a message like this one.... Thanks for the poem though!
Snowed GOLD said...
on Mar. 3 2012 at 11:11 am
Snowed GOLD, Dublin, Other
14 articles 0 photos 24 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Tread softly because you tread on my dreams&quot; - Yeats

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Not much more to add; loved the first stanza.
NickyJ BRONZE said...
on Mar. 2 2012 at 10:40 pm
NickyJ BRONZE, Hyde Park, New York
1 article 0 photos 138 comments

Favorite Quote:
&ldquo;In three words I can sum up everything I&#039;ve learned about life: it goes on.&rdquo; ~Robert Frost

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Congratulations on the Editor's Choice! :D


Gotta say I really liked reading this and can completely relate to it. I think most people can. The Rhyme Scheme is well suited, and my only criticism is the beginning of the 5th stanza.

You shouldn't told the reader point blank you didn't want to literally die. That message should have been made clear through your imagery and figurative language. I understood that message before I read those lines, however I think it takes alot away from the poem's meaning and impact on the reader.

Its a great poem and you should be proud. It's just something to think about for future poems :)