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The Broken Wing
April 5, 2009
Fluttering, soaring,
nothing but air,
the birds without
troubles, without a
care...
That's what you see,
but know what you don't?
The pain and the sorrow of
a bird, all alone.
A broken wing, with a broken soul,
This is what you see,
in a bird so alone.
The others fly on,
leave him to die! But
he knows he can soar with the others...
If he tries.
Then the child comes along,
wants to fly like a bird,
and filled with song!
She sees the little bird all on her own, and says to her mother, "Can we please take her home?"
The bird once so free, had dropped to the ground, left to die,
making nary a sound.
The bird was found,
who was once so alone,
and where is it now?
The bird found a home.
© Patricia G., Phoenix, AZ
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JOIN THE DISCUSSION
This article has 10 comments.
Sissybug2012 PLATINUM said...
on Jul. 19 2010 at 6:15 pm
LOL, THIS WAS SO CUTE!!!! I LIKED IT A LOT
At first I didn't notice that the ending stanza was shifted over to the far left and I wondered 'huh? that's it?' but then I found the last stanza, read it, and loved it! :)
You really are good at writing poetry! Can you please check out some of my writings as well?
You really are good at writing poetry! Can you please check out some of my writings as well?
amyxu said...
on Jul. 1 2009 at 3:13 pm
Hey I was browsing Teen Ink and came across your poem. This is so cute! But it can also be symbolic to, so I don't mean that in a condescending way or anything. It just struck me as being cute. I like all the rhymes you put into it and the way each stanza flows into the next. Great job!
Joanna said...
on May. 25 2009 at 7:43 pm
No worries my friend. I had a difficult time figuring out how to use teenink as well.
I'm glad you liked my poem/story thing. I feel like I have to appologise though, it is a bit depressing, or at least is to me.
I'm glad you liked my poem/story thing. I feel like I have to appologise though, it is a bit depressing, or at least is to me.
Joanna said...
on May. 21 2009 at 12:43 am
I'm so glad the comment helped! I'm also glad you liked my story and poem. Did you read any others?
It always feels so special when people comment on your work, doesn't it? ^_^
It always feels so special when people comment on your work, doesn't it? ^_^
Thank you for the critique! I'll try to use it in other poems!!
No problem!! I thoroughly enjoyed your story! And your poem, was cute and witty. I hope you continue writing!! :)
And, if you get the time, will you read my story "How the Grinch Stole Christmas-- The REAL Story!" ?? I would love your comments!
God Bless,
PLP
No problem!! I thoroughly enjoyed your story! And your poem, was cute and witty. I hope you continue writing!! :)
And, if you get the time, will you read my story "How the Grinch Stole Christmas-- The REAL Story!" ?? I would love your comments!
God Bless,
PLP
Joanna said...
on May. 5 2009 at 10:38 pm
Thank-you so much for taking the time to read and comment on my story and poem!!
I thought that the idea of this poem was really good, but I think it could flow little bit better. Play around with the lines. I hope this comment helps, and keep writing!
I thought that the idea of this poem was really good, but I think it could flow little bit better. Play around with the lines. I hope this comment helps, and keep writing!
~PLP