it seems like my days just keep getting worse. its like the all the energies are competing, racing towards me to see who can make me go insane first! Its like they are punishing me. I laugh, then i cry, always the same routine. I want to scream until my lungs explode but it seems all i can do is suffocate! im forcing myself into my pillow begging for my emotions to stop taking their knives to my insides but they dont want to listen! God help me, for i fear i know no one else will. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i scream because i can do it on paper and no where else. im dying inside and i cant even help myself.