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Alone (Tribute to Alice in Wonderland)

January 31, 2015
By CaseyChickenWang SILVER, McDonough,
More by this author
CaseyChickenWang SILVER, McDonough,
7 articles 2 photos 89 comments

Favorite Quote:
"No one likes half-jinglers! Jingle all the way!" - Shelley McNeight
"You don't get what you deserve, you get what you negotiate." - GSUMUN

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Falling
Falling
  Falling


The noise from above
   fades away
Away from the world
   I fall into silence
Silence surrounds me
   And I awake
Awake to nothing


And for the first time in forever,
I am alone
And I find myself in a world in which I am alone yet not lonely.

And for the first time in forever,
Everything is real.
My thoughts are more alive than yesterday as they carry me on to tomorrow

Away from all the pain
   into an imaginary place
Placing my fears
   out of sight
Sighting a silver lining
   I take a chance
A chance to see a different world


And for the first time in forever,
I am far from home
And for the first time forever,
I am alone

But despite it all, I am not lonely.


Because for the first time in forever,
My thoughts are my own.
They are living, breathing, nonconforming.
For I find myself
  in Wonderland.
 

© Molly H., Lynden, WA

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This article has 9 comments.

Helena_Noel BRONZE said...
on Jun. 12 2015 at 1:46 am
Helena_Noel BRONZE, Burnt Hills, New York
1 article 0 photos 629 comments

Favorite Quote:
“I'd rather see a sermon than hear one any day; I'd rather one should walk with me than merely tell the way: The eye's a better pupil and more willing than the ear, fine counsel is confusing, but example's always clear.” -Edgar Guest

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So incredibly well-formed with just a *teensy* side of breathtaking! I love how the Beginning stands out from the rest, just a few repeated words that serve to leave their shadow leaning silently over the rest and putting it into context. All throughout, there is a sense of drifting, where "My thoughts are more alive than yesterday as they carry me on/ to tomorrow." The speaker's mind is alive with some preoccupation more real than physical loneliness. Here, the movement of physical bodies doesn't seem to matter in light of the mental hideaway, of letting a shift in perception shift the way life is experienced. Thank you for inviting me to read you piece! Just spectacular.
LavanderMayday SILVER said...
on Mar. 11 2015 at 9:09 pm
LavanderMayday SILVER, Oroville, California
7 articles 0 photos 72 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Writers aren't exactly one person, they're a whole bunch of people trying to be one person"

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@CaseyChickenWang i liked how you wrote this, it felt like every word i read was hanging by a thread and if i so much took a breath it would snap..I loved that. Poems that make me hold my breath are very good. :D great job:D
CaseyChickenWang SILVER said...
on Feb. 15 2015 at 10:42 pm
CaseyChickenWang SILVER, McDonough,
7 articles 2 photos 89 comments

Favorite Quote:
"No one likes half-jinglers! Jingle all the way!" - Shelley McNeight
"You don't get what you deserve, you get what you negotiate." - GSUMUN

View profile
LOL yes, sigh, I'm gonna need to fix that but thanks a lot!
Mckay ELITE said...
on Feb. 15 2015 at 7:30 pm
Mckay ELITE, Somewhere, Virginia
146 articles 0 photos 2230 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world are the ones who do."
—Apple’s “Think Different” commercial, 1997
“Crazy people are considered mad by the rest of the society only because their intelligence isn't understood.”
― Weihui Zhou

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I'm with everyone for the most part. It's whimsical, raw, and darker in a sense. I did, however, find the line "And for the first time in forever" a little too similar to "For the First Time in Forever" from Frozen. That being said, I do enjoy reading the poem. Very surreal.
CaseyChickenWang SILVER said...
on Feb. 13 2015 at 6:40 pm
CaseyChickenWang SILVER, McDonough,
7 articles 2 photos 89 comments

Favorite Quote:
"No one likes half-jinglers! Jingle all the way!" - Shelley McNeight
"You don't get what you deserve, you get what you negotiate." - GSUMUN

View profile
Hahaha I am SO glad you noticed the shape, I'm glad it had an effect on your reading of it.
Allen. PLATINUM said...
on Feb. 12 2015 at 10:56 pm
Allen. PLATINUM, Palo Alto, California
32 articles 9 photos 525 comments

Favorite Quote:
[i]No matter how much people try to put you down or make you think other things about yourself, the only person you can trust about who you really are is you[/i] -Crusher-P

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It isn't haiku. And freeverse poetry doesn't have to rhyme...
Losutus_soul BRONZE said...
on Feb. 12 2015 at 6:39 pm
Losutus_soul BRONZE, Indianapolis, Indiana
2 articles 0 photos 26 comments
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UMMMM I THINK THIS IS FREEVERSE. AND I GET THAT YOU LIKE POETRY BUT I THINK IT IS SUPPOSED TO RYHME NOT JUST YOU KNOW. HAIKU LIKE POEMS.
Allen. PLATINUM said...
on Feb. 12 2015 at 6:35 pm
Allen. PLATINUM, Palo Alto, California
32 articles 9 photos 525 comments

Favorite Quote:
[i]No matter how much people try to put you down or make you think other things about yourself, the only person you can trust about who you really are is you[/i] -Crusher-P

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I really like your work. It's both whimsical and slightly frightening, like a darker version of the real Wonderland. I agree with Robot on the shape of the verses. They match the insanity of your writing.
RobotPenn. SILVER said...
on Feb. 12 2015 at 5:05 pm
RobotPenn. SILVER, El Paso, Texas
8 articles 1 photo 81 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Profound change is cumulative."

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I love, love, love the verse about being alone, but not being lonesome, with world of your own to create. Magical. Just magical. Also, this may sound weird, but I really liked just looking at the shape of the verses. How they were a little uneven and short and then long, with plenty of space to breath in between. Beautiful. I loved it!