Hoozy Thinky Iz | Teen Ink

Hoozy Thinky Iz

April 1, 2013
By Catcher GOLD, Edinburg, Texas
Catcher GOLD, Edinburg, Texas
14 articles 0 photos 12 comments

Favorite Quote:
I can't explain what I mean, and even if I could, I'm not sure I'd feel like it.

“Hoozy Thinky Iz” Wayne White said through my screen.

My screen,

my screen to my laptop, the one I claim is mine but my mom says is hers. The one we pawn for 50 – 100 dollars every other week to keep food on the table,

on the table, but not really, because the last time we ever ate at the table I was nine or ten, and my brother had already gone. Too soon for my taste but a selfish act he had to make so he,

Could stay sane. A selfish act he had to make with no explanation besides an apology,

but an explanation was not needed, cause I knew what was driving him away, but he didn’t get a note like I did, from a wise and wonderful boy, who if only had heeded his own advice, may not have broken two hearts on the same day,

“Don’t do what I did to mom”.

And I haven’t, nor could I.

Because my strength went out the door when he did

And now they all say he’s broken and lost, so smart, but lost, a prodigy with no will
He has that creative genius flare, but the lax attitude of a too-smart-for-his-own-good slacker, not that he’s slacking. He just doesn’t care,

But, Hoozy Thinky Iz, but none other than an experienced and broken down kid, plastered on a platter to be fed to the dogs, when he had so much to offer,

I don’t know, maybe it’s the drugs he’s on, because when I saw him, I saw something else,

I saw a dreamer with a heart and a soul, and a body that was willing to go somewhere for others,

Not this laid back, pot head, with a tortured mind, worried for his family, but no interest to be involved.

Then again,

Who do I think,

I am?

To judge and preach about what kind of failure failures are, when I can’t even allow myself to look in a mirror anymore, without distaste,

Who has failed me?

I have begun to realize, it wasn’t him when he left,

It was me when I let my heart sneak out with him,

When I allowed myself to believe, I was too weak to cope with pain,

When I convinced myself, I was to blame for other’s sorrow, as if I’m a plague on those who smile,

When I remembered every mistake I’ve made, and owned it, without recalling my potential, and my successes.

When I became the no good, worthless, undeserving, undesirable, and insecure fool I am today,

When I started to think, I was a hopeless case,

Instead of someone with a heart and soul and a body that was willing to go ANYWHERE for the better of ANYONE, as long as it would mean something.
So I put these words down, on a screen,

A screen,

That is a gateway to the very same people I have failed, and my brother has failed, and we have all failed at some point, with a note, saying

Don’t do the same thing.

The author's comments:
This was my first go at Spoken Word Poetry.I'm certainly no Sarah Kay, but maybe one day I'll come close. It's my dream.

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This article has 1 comment.

on Nov. 2 2013 at 12:38 am
hillary_ SILVER, Bolivar, Missouri
6 articles 0 photos 9 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter dont' mind."-Dr. Seuss

Girl, you fight for your dream! There is no stopping you unless you allow it. Be all that you want to be and go for it with all of your heart. Best wishes. I hope to hear your poetry one day.