Your Passing Fancy | Teen Ink

Your Passing Fancy

August 23, 2010
By TheNVynceAble BRONZE, Bartlesville, Oklahoma
TheNVynceAble BRONZE, Bartlesville, Oklahoma
2 articles 0 photos 15 comments

Favorite Quote:
"God created man because he loves stories" -Elie Wiesel


I knew
I wasn’t good enough for you
I guess
I was an emotional mess

I am that one girl
Her head in a different world
One of her own
You should have shown
You cared

You know that one…
The one you won
In a heartbeat
Because you’re sweet
So I thought
Because I was caught
Off guard
When you played your nice card

I’m that one girl
Who you want in your group
Though I’m not in your troupe
Because you want my grade
The one that I made
Not you!
It’s mine!
Whatever, I guess it’s fine

Through the grapevine
I saw you
I’m a real big fan of thine
You never noticed
In the remotest

I had you under false pretenses
With my five senses
I have no clue
What to do about you

You gave up
During my emotional letup
You never cared
Only compared
Me to her

If you can live without me for two years
Say cheers
With your other friends
Cover your ears
Ignore my tears
It only appears
That I’m all right
Tonight

You know, that one girl
What’s her name?
What a shame
Very fine
Next in line
That’s not what I want

You belonged to me
But I didn’t belong to you
You never proved you were true
A friend

I’m so neurotic
Your eyes are hypnotic
This location exotic
I believed you when you said
The red
Lying
While you were eyeing
Her

Woe is you
But now, woe isn’t me
You are too blind to see
My tears
My fears

I could write you all the stories in the world
Make you fall in love with the characters
The last word you spoke to my face was “nothing”
And then I was running
Away
To my bay window
To let it all go
Hiding
Out of shame
You were playing the game
Of naive teenagers

When I was falling
I wished you were calling

I remember every word you said
This is dead
Put to rest
I’m done with my tests
You can leave now, I guess

I thought that nothing could replace that lifetime friendship
I was wrong
Now you remind me of that one song
And you’re gone
Seemingly forever
You’re not there in class
You’re not there when I speak to you
Instead of with me, you’re with the masses
Have you ever thought of what I could do?
No!
Of course not!
You have to be in the spot
Light
At the end of the tunnel
It’s drawing me nearer like a funnel
In Oklahoma

I refuse
To choose
You
Like you never chose
Me

That one, for real best friend is what I lack
Who cut each other slack
Have each other’s back
But you don’t want me like that
Only an acquaintance
Just someone you knew once
You’re so impervious!
Hear, but not listen
You’re good medicine
With bad after effects
You’re like that voice in the back of my head
That little kid poking me in the ribs
That dull crayon
My favorite ice cream flavor melting in the summer
That silence hanging over

Fake smiles
The endless piles
Of paper
Maybe later
You’ll read the things I wrote you
When you’re with her my eyes turn green
You didn’t see me at all
Through the glass
That you passed
The other day
Laughing

You see, I wrote this about you
Pouring my soul out
About
The concrete
Wall that’s invisible to you
Just like me
I no longer exist in your world
You see? I was just a figment of your imagination once
Something you used to like
An old fad
Now you’re gone to the bad
Side
Of the wall
Where you’re blind to my presence
There’s still that essence
Of you in my brain
That won’t erode away
Fast enough
I was too psychological
For your taste
Sure I hide in my closet
If you would’ve cared at all you would’ve came and cried with me
But wait, you were the reason for my tears
Why do I linger here?
Because you picked me
Tricked me
Maybe I’m just a thing stuck in the past
How long can I last
In this state
Of mind
You said we could still be friends
That depends
On your terms

I want to say I would go to the ends of the earth
To get you back
But I can’t do that
Because you stole my heart away
Butchered it to pieces
Turned it into a steak
And ate it on fast Sunday

Nice things you said were lies
Deaf to my cries
For your personality
I guess you could say
I was the shadow that followed you around
Your passing fancy


The author's comments:
I know this poem is sort of long, but I needed to pour all of this out.

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