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Shattered
Maybe it took one word to set off the bomb,
but it takes a lifetime to spell out that word.
Maybe I just need a night under the sky
of blinking satellites and stars and falling meteors
to clear this life of its mistakes.
Maybe it took one person to set me on guard,
but felons and thieves build a case against my trust.
Maybe I just need them to all disappear
and leave me and the open sea,
the forests and terrains to explore
because it takes forgetting fear of loss to lose that fear.
Maybe it took physical pain to forget the lies,
but recovery is the hardest form of revival.
Maybe I'm done with explaining my stupid problems
and the jealousy boiling down my imagination
because these issues lie on misunderstood ears,
and my intricate thoughts become nonsensical jell-o.
Maybe it took one innocent question to bring about this outcome,
but paranoia shadows the depths I’m willing to leap.
Maybe you don’t know me,
and how you’re tearing me apart
because even I can’t decode my own attraction
to someone like you.
Maybe it took one misunderstanding to throw it all away,
but I create unrealistic expectations.
Maybe you can never know me
because that’s the way I push people away,
and I’m challenging your capability,
daring you to walk away
because that’s all I’ve ever known.
Maybe it took an entire lifetime to send my signal for help,
but waiting for an answer has kept me trapped.
Maybe it’s not that I want the attention;
I just want someone who cares,
and maybe you are the best
and worst miracle to walk out of my life.
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