I saunter into school

Head down.

A fake smile glued to my face

rain clouds in my head.

Drip.

drop. 

drip.

The rain followed me wherever I went, 

But I tuck away darkness with fake light

A cheap, dim flashlight

Just to keep the others happy.

They didn’t need to know,

They wouldn’t care

All that horrid stuff I had to bear 

On my shoulders.

The heavy buckets weighed me down, 

Almost dragging me to the floor.

But I carry it

Act that I am strong;

I’m weak inside,

A paper that rips

If you force it to.

Careful not to spill

Can’t let a drop fall

Without the entire bucket pouring out

the tears I have kept in.

It’s hard, but I not break fragile hearts 

Even though mine is shattered.

When trust is dropped, 

It will shatter

Almost every time

But no matter the height,

Hearts so fragile 

They can shatter 

From a drop below your knee. 

So be careful with the thin twigs of trust you hold,

Because once a wire is broken,

The whole circuit is useless

Can't be repaired.

Memories being sorted in my brain,

But I see them happen all over again 

I feel the same pain I did then.

I get my heart stabbed with many arrows, 

But from so much grief

I not even begin to pull them out

I can never move on

From the war i’ve seen

From the fights and battles 

And how many bonds of trust were snapped,

Covering the ground.

I get home,

Rip off the fake smile I glue to my face every morning 

Feeling pain.

I pull down the curtains,

my head to the pillow,

Grasping it so tight

Trying to feel someone hold me with comfort

When my room is empty.

I cry a waterfall of rivers,

Of rain,

Of the pain inside me.
I hold back the tears

With a smile glued to my face, 

never to smile true.