Congratulations on the new addition to your family! Now for some important questions. Blue or Pink? Trucks or Dolls? Baseballs or Butterflies? Answers that differ depending on the gender of your new baby. This also determines how you may raise your child. Though the gender shouldn’t matter how you raise them.

As parents we want the best for our kids, regardless of gender. We all know from past traditions and lifestyles of the world that sons are a gift because they carry on the family name and support the family. They are raised to be confident, strong, and brave. This is why we want sons, so they can support their family and when they get married, and have kids, the family line continues. Daughters are a blessing, just like sons, but we don’t really shine as much light on them. Girls are raised to maintain the house and take care of the kids. They are raised to be housekeepers, stay at home moms who aren’t meant to support the family.

We raise our children with different hopes and standards for their future. There are many reasons why we do this to our children and it needs to stop. By not stopping, we place limitations on what our children can and can’t do in their future. However, if we stop this our children will have many freedoms and can grow up with the sense that they can be what they want to be.

Daughters are given dolls, gentle toys that would ‘appeal’ to a girl’s needs. We stereotype girls into liking dolls and gentle easy going toys when some would prefer to play with legos and trucks. Boys are raised to like tough toys, things that can be smashed, pounded, and pushed to the point of breaking. Some may not want those kinds of toys, they may want the ‘gentler’ toys. We need to stop stereotyping our kids into liking toys that are set for them. Gender and toys aren’t set in stone, they can change over time. Girls and boys should decide who and what they play with. It is up to them to decide what they like, however parents should have some input. For example if something, like a videogame, is too old for their child then it is the parents call on whether or not they want their child to play with that.

Parents aren’t the only ones who place limitations on and stereotype girls. Society does this as well. Everyone knows that when it comes to the real world girls are shot down when expressing their own opinions and speaking out. Girls can speak out but there is a line to which they cannot cross that boys can when it comes down to the right of expression. Girls can complain for years upon years about how unfair things may be for them, like the known fact that women get paid less than men. But when they speak out about this does anything change? No. They are shot down and are forced into compliance.

Boys are no different. They have their fair share of limitations and stereotypes as well. They are always pushed to be like society's stereotypes of them. They are meant to be tough and macho when that's not what some want to be. Some want to be gentle and not have the pressure of being what boys their age are meant to be. Boys can be both gentle and tough, there is no set guidelines that need to be followed when it comes to a boy’s personality. Men have a lot of perks in their lives they get paid better than women and they have a lot of freedoms. They can express themselves past the line that women aren’t meant cross.

In Shakespeare's most famous play, Romeo and Juliet, the young Juliet is only 14 when she marries 15 year old Romeo. In this piece, it is stated multiple times that Juliet should have been married sooner and that many young girls younger than her have made happy mothers. This has obviously changed but historically this is accurate. Girls were expected to be married young and have kids as soon as possible so the family name can be carried on. Juliet didn’t have much of a say in her marriage either. Before she met Romeo her father was set on having her marry Paris. Juliet didn’t want this and when she spoke out to her parents about it her father yelled at her. There was little say in whom she was going to marry. We don’t do this anymore but it shows the little freedoms girls had and still have. But girls weren’t the only ones who had this problem. If a boy’s father wanted him to marry someone he didn’t want, he’d have no say in the matter. Both boys and girls have always had their struggles when it came to how they are viewed and how their parents view and want their kids lives to be.
Nowadays we say that we don’t do this to our kids but in truth we do. We are influencing our children to become someone that they may not want to be. But if we can stop making our kids do things that they don’t want, we can change the way we as parents and society itself sees gender differences. All we need to do is change the way we raise our kids.

The article Talking Equality When Raising Sons and Daughters talks about how parents raise their children differently. “Parents are protective over daughters and permissive of their sons” (Daniel). This is true and is a problem. We need to be protective and permissive of both genders. We need to protect our sons as much as we protect our daughters. We should be permissive, give freedoms equally, despite gender differences. Girls need to know how to defend themselves in situations in which parents not there to protect them. Boys are the same way, they can also be in situations where they won’t be able to defend themselves. They’ll need protection. We need equal freedoms and protection for both genders of children.

Some people may think that how we raise our children is fine. That raising them according to gender is a good thing and to raise our sons and daughters properly, they need to know how society sees them and wants them to be. This is not true. There are many situations in the real world that would not go well if we raised our children this way. We raise our sons to be headstrong and outgoing, but there are always those moments that needing to be gentle is key. With daughters it’s vice versa. We raise them to need protection, but there are times when they may need to be the one protecting and to be stronger. We do need to show our sons and daughters how they are viewed by society, but we need to tell them that they don’t need to be as society says. They need to know they can love what they like and act in ways that society may not view their gender.

We need our hopes, dreams, and standards for our children to change. They need to be who they want, to do what they want, and to live as they want to. It is not our place to tell our kids what they can or can’t do. It’s up to them to decide, it is their life not ours. It’s their choice, not ours. Sure we need to protect them from the dangers of the world. But why should we prevent our kids from the freedoms that they deserve? We need to change our standards for our kids. Times change. Traditions should too.