I don’t want to live forever.

For me, the term “immortality” is too vague and unpredictable.

What if I do live forever, but in continuous agony and pain brought by my physical health? This makes immortality a kind of torture. If I live as a vegetable forever, it would be a completely meaningless life. Plus, I would need many people to look after me if I am in that awful condition. What if I was bold, did things wrong, and will be living in remorse forever?

That is a torture for my mental health. I would be recalling the things again and again. What if the ones I love most deeply die and gradually fade away? I would be “Like a sick eagle looking at the sky.” I would feel weak and lonely. I absolutely don’t want to be living in remorse and pain, only biological living forever. That, from my perspective of view, is even worse than death. Moreover, being mortal teaches us to cherish. In the limited amount of time, you can experience enjoying your hobbies, growing up, being married, having kids, being grandparents, and so on. None of them could be perfectly experienced, and you have to move into the next stage because of your growing age.

However, “this a gentle luxury to weep.” It is precisely that sense of limit and hurry that tells us to cherish what you have and had. They are all limited, and that is exactly how they teach us to be thankful, to be content with our lot. It’s like when a child has a hundred candies, he won’t refuse to share them with other people because he has a lot. But when the child have only two sweets, he will obviously cherish the little that he got. He might put them into a little box that he hide carefully in a cupboard, or he might put the two candies he got under his pillow. When he finally eat them, the sweets can bring him more happiness than 100 ones without cherishing.

And these are the reasons for why I don’t want to live forever.