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A Modest Proposal to Parents Concerning the Rising Rates of Children with Obesity
They walk among us. We see them in department stores, begging their mothers to get them that toy on the top shelf. We see them in grocery stores, trying to decide which ice cream to possibly get. We see them, we notice them, yet we fail to help them. Its saddening to see all these fattened, overweight children struggling to catch up with all the other kids at the playground. Children shouldnt be covered in the same wrinkly fat they have when their babies. They should be able to run until their legs give up, not until their chest tells them they cant breath after five seconds.
This problem is ever present in not just our American society, but world wide: New Zealand, England, Africa. It's an ongoing problem that persists to worsen every year that we, as the adult population, fail to take action.
There's been countless studies done worldwide to see what causes produces what effects. Genetics environments and even syndromes, like Cushing syndrome where “overweight is one of the cardinal features…” (Davies & Fitzgerald, 2008), all have a possible effect on these children, and almost all these studies point to some probable cause in a child’s life that most likely has contributed to development of such an outrageous weight. Parents are neglecting their children by raising them into a beast of fat and hyper-extended skin.
My numbers tell me that this country is becoming overrun with obese children, and we are sitting right along with them, binge watching tv-shows, filled with commercials of healthy children paying with their friends outside. How ironic. Unfortunately, ‘kids spend half their waking hours in front of screens’ (“New Student Results”, 2018), which only influences the rate of childhood obesity to skyrocket. We, as adults, parent, and guardians are role models for the younger generation and when we don't “intervene with kids who are overweight,... their health risk factors… worsen…” (“New Student Results”, 2018), which leads me into another conundrum.
Obesity doesn't just come with built in fat and squishy cheeks and bloated stomachs. It comes equipped with risk factors to a child's health and these poor souls “struggle every day with asthma, sleep apnea, and the other psychological and health challenges” (“New Student Results”, 2018). Our future generation is suffering and the “number of children treated in hospitals for weight-related conditions has quadrupled…” (“One in five”. 2013) because of the condition in which we provide them with. If we don't change our way in order to reduce this outbreak, we will no longer have the medicinal funds for more important things, like cancer cures and plastic surgery improvements.
I’ve engendered a proposal; a humble proposal. A proposal that rid the United States and its global friends of the fastly-growing pressure of childhood obesity. I’ve discovered a way to help our children of the future, to free them from their fat-filled entrapments, to cure their many health risks. Such a proposal is too beneficial not to share.
Therefore, I offer humbly offer that we create the Correction Program that includes investing in buildings that would serve as correctional facilities. These buildings would be made available in every part of the world, since in fact child obesity is prevalent in every part of the world as well. Furthermore, such buildings would serve to provide regimens for obese children to follow in order for them to be set on the right path… the healthy path.
These facilities, in my mind, would be clean and modestly furnished to provide children with a “home-away-from-home” and encourage active engagement in their peers.
I presume that any child who overexedes the recommended BMI that corresponds with their age would have the privilege to become a member of the Correction Program. This program would be dedicated to fixing the children with excessive amounts of fat through extensive programs and activities. Children would be given their very own 8x8x8 feet space accompanied with brand new stainless steel bars to adorn it on every side.
A healthy diet makes a healthy child. So, healthy diets, put together with some water, a couple whole-wheat crackers, and plenty of stale air, will certainly help get obese children drenched in fat into tip-top shape in no time.
The Correction Program would use efficient programs to effectively transform you child from all fat and rolls to all skin and bones, while also using comprehensive tactics to ensure the child is coherent and breathing during the duration of their stay.
Programs and activities that I mentioned early would be important to the children's progress throughout their weight loss journey. This is why I’ve also engendered several ways for such a thing to be ensured: encouraging fast movement through incentive with food, encouraging jumping exercises by heating the bottom of their living space, inducing sweat through sauna-like temperatures, etc. These programs would top-notch and provide an exceptional way of getting rid of the children’s excess fat quickly.
After these children has attained their required weight goal, they will be granted to return to their homes. However, in order to prevent the rate of child obesity from spiking up once again, I’ve produced an added measure that would further protect the globe from childhood fatness.
If children revert back to their unhealthy ways after returning, and yes, each child from the Correction Program will be marked and monitored, they will be required to return to the facility for a life’s work in the buildings.
Now, some people, especially Americans, would render this proposal as obsolete to the great American values that are centered around the protection of their own blood and nation. However, I humbly state that this proposals benefits greatly exceeds the negative aspects that may be imposed upon my solution.
Firstly, child obesity rates would plummet. Children will be changed into new and semi-improved people who represent a better change. Children who haven't even been able to become apart of the program will be influenced by their other peers who have to begin their weight change even before attending.
Secondly, every family carried with the burden of providing for an obese child is not longer responsible for somethings that's developed past their control. There would be more quality time to spend with their other children, more funds to spend on groceries that will potentially last longer than normal since there’s no longer a big mouth to feed, more time to focus on their own health.
Thirdly, the children who are exposed to the benefits of the Correction Program will leave with a exponentially higher incentive to live a better and healthier lifestyle than before. This would, of course, significantly decrease the possibility of children reverting back to their below-par lifestyles.
Fourthly, pediatricians will no longer be bothered by cases of high-risk health issues as a result of weight-related factors. These doctors would be able to focus on other problems in the youth populations and be able to better provide for other children who have more life-threatening illnesses, like diabetes or cystic fibrosis.
Fifthly, the proposal would serve also as an incentive for families themselves to turn their lifestyles around. Because families will be giving their kids up for them to achieve a better life, that would in turn allow such families to focus on themselves and enforce positive lifestyle changes to make themselves better, not just their children. In other words, my proposal doesn’t just help transform children, but families too.
Sixthly, this would be a great opportunity for kids, who need a little more incentive to change their life around, to earn a job that will not only provide them shelter and moderated eating diets but also a permanent way to stay in moderate health. Working is a excellent way for kids to learn the way of life and the responsibilities of adulthood.
In consideration, I expect that there will be a considerate amount of objection that will in no way produce any greater of an effect on the current problem at hand than my proposed solution.
I assume that many Americans, specifically, will consider my solution some sort of from of child-endangerment and therefore will object my proposal. Some might possible argue that the proposal targets those who have little control of their physical state, like genetics or environment the child live in.
No such objections will lessen the great affect my proposed solution will have. No human being can persuade me different of other solutions: Of putting more efforts into educating children in grade school about nutrition and healthy eating habits through instructional lessons and visual, like MyPlate: Of making nutrition a mandatory class to ensure students of all grade levels are given guideline to living a productive, healthy-eating lifestyle: Of creating informational posters, that would be displayed throughout schools and eating places world wide, filled with informational wordage and helpful diagrams to spread awareness about obesity and how anyone can help resolve it: Of creating initiatives for low-income families to have affordable access to fresh foods and organic foods in order to discourage cheap meals at the local fast food place: Of encouraging families to regularly take their children to checkups to ensure already obese children are monitored for extreme health-risk factors: Of increasing attention towards public school cafeterias by providing funds and sponsorships to provide healthier food options for students: Of requiring physical education or any other physical activity for all student K-12: Of encouraging more research to be carried out regarding the rare cases where obesity is engendered by hormonal causes.
I conclude that there will be no objections to my proposal unless such solutions are carried out with the same amount of efficiency and dedication as the proposed Correction Program would.
If we, as a nation, as human, let this cascade on into a worldwide epidemic of over-stimulated subcutaneous tissue, how will we keep up financially, for the “economic cost of obesity…” for one U.S. state “is estimated at 8.5 billion per year…” (“Collaborative Project”, 2018) and this number continues to escalate.
I, myself, have nothing against the poor children who’ve cocooned themselves and their health in a wall of premature fat nor the parents and families of such children. In all honestly I sympathise and pity those who have succumb to the addictive life of unhealthy actions for its easy to succumb but difficult to defeat. I just want what’s best for America and the globe.
Work Citied
"Collaborative Project Using New Data to Combat Obesity and Get SC Children Active." US Official News, 28 May 2018. Infotrac Newsstand.
Davies, H. Dele., and Hiram E. Fitzgerald. Obesity in Childhood and Adolescence. Praeger, 2008.
"Income inequality impacts obesity in children." Scoop Media, 9 Apr. 2018. Infotrac Newsstand.
"LACK OF SLEEP AND CHILD OBESITY." States News Service, 27 May 2011. Infotrac Newsstand.
"New Study Results From LSU's Pennington Biomedical Are First to Show That Video Games Combined With Virtual Fitness Coach Support Can Improve Health in Children With Obesity; 7/24 AT Triage - 7/20 doc scraped." Targeted News Service, 30 July 2018. Infotrac Newsstand.
"One in five councils allocates no money to tackling child obesity; One in five local councils has allocated no money to tackle child obesity despite warnings that it is the biggest timebomb facing today's youth, figures show." Telegraph Online, 24 Sept. 2013. Infotrac Newsstand.
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This piece was composed based on a required Englsih project that analyzed satirical essays and used satirical devices, like understatement, sarcasm, and hyperboles, to propose a solution to a real-world problem. This piece was strictly for the purpose of creating a satirical proposal in order to understand satire and it's influence, and it does not, in any way, reflect my personal opinions or views on childhood obesity.