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Undecided
I've never had any thoughts about my future. Whenever someone asks me, “What are you gonna go to college for?” I would always get nervous causing my legs to shake because of feeling as if I am supposed to have my life planned out already. But rolling my eyes fully to the back of my head with anger rising to avoid the question. I always say “I don’t know” or “I am unsure” if I have to answer.
When I was 12 years old, knowing high school was coming and having to make more choices for myself. I looked for the highest paying jobs. Surgeon after Surgeon was popping up. Not knowing how hard that job would be at the time. Whenever someone asked me from ages 12-15, I always would puff out my chest with pride…neurosurgeon or anesthesiologist because those were very prestigious jobs.
As I grew older, realizing that there was not too much time left before leaving high school to college, being asked what I wanted to do, those questions still never went away but were asked constantly. Always wondering, having that question in mind, what am I gonna do after high school.
When the beginning of junior year hit. I was told to write about what I wanna study in college or about life after high school. Remember looking up different jobs which matched who I truly was from my limited interests. Criminal Justice and therapists one after the next emerging with options in those categories. Crime investigators sounded most interesting, causing me to do research about this job. I've always known I had an interest in investigating and problem solving. When being younger I was always invested in watching Murder/Crime shows. Solving problems through the show was always what eagered me the most. When finding this is what matched who I was made me think “I actually wanna do this for a career path.”
Still might change and not knowing what lies ahead after senior year but it's a start.
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This piece is about growing up and not to feel pressured to decide on whats next in life even if there is pressure around you wanting you to move on. Taking time and being who you want to be and what you want to do is the heathiest choice.