Scene:
Characters:
First Edition Gutenberg Bible (aka Gutenberg). Male.
Knowledgeable, Old fashioned, patient. He has lived in the
bookshelf for along time, and wants to prove books are better
than e-Readers.
Kindle e-reader(aka Kindle). Male. New Kindle brought to the
home of Gutenberg. He is very technical and sarcastic. He
wants to prove e-readers are better than books.
Time Magazine(aka Time).Is friends with Gutenberg and holds a
lot of information.
EBooks: Projections from Kindle.
Macbeth. Male. Talks dramatically, sometimes moody, and quick
to praise.
Twilight: Female. Mouths off. Acts like a teenager, often
repeats stuff off pages.
Marley and Me(aka MAM). Female. Happy go lucky, talks a lot.
Whinny the Pooh: Male. Young, giggly. Always singing whinny
the pooh.
SCENE STARTS IN A DARKENED OFFICE, THE ROOM IS RICHLY
FURNISHED. SPOTLIGHT IS DIRECTED ON A BOOKSHELF. GUTENBERG IS
WAKING UP HE THEN NOTICES KINDLE WHO HAS JUST MOVED IN.
GUTENBERG
Good marrow, electronic device, you
must be new to the master’s home.
KINDLE
KINDLE WAKES UP MAKING A PURRING SOUND.
Good morning sir, I am not just an
electronic device, I am and
electronic reader, my name is
Kindle.
GUTENBERG
GUTENBERG WADDLES TOWARDS KINDLE, INTEREST ON HIS FACE
And what Mr. Kindle is an
electronic reader?
KINDLE
Laughing and walking around Gutenberg
Wow you must be really old.
(Buzzing, Gutenberg glares
at Kindle)
Well old man I am the newest
technological innovation in reading
books!
GUTENBERG
PACING, KINDLE IS STILL LAUGHING
What do you mean reading books, I
don’t see a page in you?
KINDLE
KINDLE WALKS TO UPPER RIGHT STAGE A LOOK OF SMUGNESS ON HIS
FACE, GUTENBERG FOLLOWS HIM
I don’t need paper, I have
electronic books, eBooks, you can
download them through server farms.
GUTENBERG
Ebook what’s that, I have never
heard of an electronic book before.
KINDLE
SMILE ON KINDLES FACE, LIGHTS ARE DIMMING
Well would you like to meet them?
GUTENBERG
UHH....
KINDLE
GOOD!
THE STAGE GOES BLACK, SMOKE COMES UP, STRANGE ELECTRONIC
SOUNDS ARE HEARD, SPOT LIGHT COMES ON KINDLE AND GUTENBERG,
GUTENBERG IS FRIGHTENED.
TWILIGHT
APPEARS LOOKING AT GUTENBERG.
Like wow, your like totally old!
MACBETH
APPEARS NEXT TO TWILIGHT A LOOK OF CONTEMPT ON HIS FACE
Lady Twilight! That tis most unlady
like.
(TURNING TOWARDS
GUTENBERG)
2.
(MORE)
Greetings Good sir, my name is Lord
Macbeth!
MARLEY AND ME
MAM APPEARS NEXT TO MACBETH, SHE IS LOOKING AROUND THE OFFICE
Wow this is a very nice place,
don’t ya’ think Twilight?
TWILIGHT
Totally MAM it’s like totally fancy
and all.
WHINNY THE POOH
APPEARS GIGGLING NEXT TO MAM
Whinny the pooh, He he he!
GUTENBERG IS SHAKING IN FEAR NEXT TO KINDLE AS HE LOOKS AT
THE EBOOKS.
GUTENBERG
Ar-rre th-here an-ny mm-ore of you
in-n tt-here?
TWILIGHT
Like duh man, Kindle here can hold
like 800 of us. My sister Newmoon
was going to come, but she is like
always crying and is moody and
all,so she didn’t.
MACBETH
MACBETH’S HANDS SWEEP THE EBOOKS HE IS SMILING AS IF HE HAS
SELF IMPORTANCE.
Lords and Ladies of Kindle we must
be so kind as to introduce
ourselves.
(POINTING TO MAM) This is
the fine Lady Marley and
Me.
MARLEY AND ME
Hi ya, I go by MAM, this is a nice
place ya got here, ya know!
GUTENBERG
Pleased to meet your acquaintance,
I’m sure.
3.
MACBETH (cont'd)
MACBETH
POINTING TOWARDS TWILIGHT WHO IS BORED AND LOOKING AWAY.
This is the young Lady Twilight.
TWILIGHT
Whatever man.
MACBETH
WALKING TOWARDS WHINNY THE POOH WHO IS SITTING ON THE GROUND
OF THE SHELVE.
Last this child is Whinny the Pooh,
but he goes by Pooh.
WHINNY THE POOH
Whinny the Poooooh, he he he!
GUTENBERG
LOOKING BACK AND FORTH BETWEEN THEM.
Well, Um, nice to meet your
acquaintances.
THE LIGHT IN NOW ON FULL THE EBOOKS AND KINDLE ARE ALL AROUND
EACH OTHER, GUTENBERG IS LEFT ON THE OUTSIDE AND IS TRYING TO
BE HEARD.
EBOOKS
ALL TALKING AT ONCE.
GUTENBERG
Excuse me?
(NOTHING) EXCUSE ME!
(YELLING, THEY ALL LOOK AT
HIM)
TWILIGHT
DUUDE! There’s like no need to like
yell/About three things I was
absolutely positive. First, Edward
was a vampire. Second, there was
part of him — and I didn’t know how
potent that part might be — that
thirsted for my blood. And third, I
was unconditionally and irrevocably
in love with him.
MACBETH
LAUGHING AS HE WALKS UP TO TWILIGHT.
4.
Ha, Ha, Lady Twilight you seem to
be saying quotes from your
characters again.
(TWILIGHT IS LOOKING DOWN
EMBARRASSED)
GUTENBERG
AGAIN TRYING TO BE HEARD OVER THE NOSY EBOOKS.
Hmm, Hmm
(CLEARING HIS THROAT )
Well, I have been around for a very
long time, and I have never seen or
heard of anything like you!
MARLEY AND ME
Exactly how old are Gutenberg.
GUTENBERG
PUFFING HIM SELF UP AND WALKING TO UPPER RIGHT STAGE.
Well being a first edition of the
Gutenberg Bible the rarest book. I
was printed in 1456, and am out of
my numerous siblings printed, I am
out of 21 complete copies that
remain.
MACBETH
A LOOK OF PURE ADMIRATION, WALKS TOWARDS GUTENBERG
Sir, honorable sir, you are like a
king to/
KINDLE
BUTTING IN A SMUG LOOK ON HIS FACE, LAUGHING.
King, ha, ha, he might be a first
edition, but if you haven’t heard
he still uses paper and paper books
are bad for the environment.
MARLEY AND ME
Yeah, I heard that those paper
mills and pulp mills release CO2,
Nitrogen oxides, sulfur oxides,
carbon monoxide, and particulates/
FROM THE DESK TIME MAGAZINE JUMPS UP
TIME MAGAZINE
Yes, and those factors contribute
to Global warming, smog, acid rain,
and respiratory problems.
5.
(MORE)
Also to state a fact the US paper
industry had emissions of 17.2
Million metric tons of CO2 in 1994,
nice to meet you I am Time
Magazine.
KINDLE
See books are really bad for the
environment.
GUTENBERG
Well what about you?
KINDLE
Me? Well my carbon foot print is
167.18 Kg of CO2, and having me can
save up to 690 kg of CO2 a year. I
can reduce 3.5% of an average
American’s 20 metric tons of yearly
emissions.
GUTENBERG
Yes, but what are you made of?
KINDLE
HA! I won’t tell and neither will
my creators Amazon!
TIME MAGAZINE
Hey Gutenberg I can answer that,
well sort of!
GUTENBERG
LOOKING SMUG GUTENBERG SMILES AT TIME MAGAZINE.
Go ahead Time magazine.
TIME MAGAZINE
Well, human rights violations
associated with the mining of
minerals that are in electronic
devices in Africa.
(LOOKING AT KINDLE)
Kindle, you probably have some of
these minerals gold, tin, tatalum,
and tugsten. The companies that are
mining them don’t follow the
Environmental Responsibility
policy. In Rwanda they use
prisoners of war and children to do
the mining. In the Democratic
Republic of Congo uses 50,000
children work in the mines.
6.
TIME MAGAZINE (cont'd)
(MORE)
The privatization of these mines
have displaced tens of thousands of
people, while causing
desertification.
A SHOCKED SILENCE COMES OVER THE STAGE THE LIGHTS DIM.
TWILIGHT
OMG! That’s like totally awful.
MACBETH
I thought books were only bad for
the environment.
MARLEY AND ME
Time Magazine, which is better for
the environment Kindle or
Gutenberg?
TIME MAGAZINE
All the experts are still debating
whether an ebook is more
environmentally friendly than a
paper book. That is because Amazon,
Kindle’s creator, is staying quiet
on the environmental aspects of
Kindles.
GUTENBERG
I guess it is for the consumer to
decide.
KINDLE
Your right.
GUTENBERG
Well Kindle I know I will be seeing
you around, on the self, so lets
agree to disagree.
KINDLE
SMILING AT GUTENBERG, WALKS TO STAND NEXT TO HIM.
Agreed, well, good night Gutenberg.
GUTENBERG
Good night Kindle and ebooks.
LIGHTS DIM, MACBETH IS THE LAST EBOOK TO GO INTO KINDLE, HE
WALKS TO CENTER STAGE.
7.
TIME MAGAZINE (cont'd)
MACBETH
You must decide hereafter; The
facts have been stated it is now
thy choice. To-morrow, and tomorrow,
and to-morrow, Creeps in
the need to be environmentally
friendly the need quickening from
day to day and will till the last
of recorded time, all our
yesterdays have been lighted the
way by fools to the earth’s dusty
death. Out, out, Kindle! Life's but
a walking shadow, a poor animal
That walks upon the earth And then
is heard no more: it is a tale
brought on by idiots, full of wrong
choices, Signifying that it is your
choice to pick the right or the
wrong.
SCENE ENDS AS MACBETH DISAPPEARS, KINDLE GOES TO SLEEP MAKING
A PURRING SOUND, CURTAINS CLOSE.