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Tough Love
Like most saturday nights, yesterday I spent a lovely evening with my mother, munching on chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream and watching a cheesy chick flick. That evenings movie of the night was the worldly known comedy Thirteen Going On Thirty. While I of course felt joyous watching “Jenna” finally end up with her best friend “Matt”, I couldn’t help but feel upset afterwards. To come to think of it, most nights, after enjoying one of these romance movies, I find myself feeling depressed and disappointed. Why? Seeing two people come together perfectly makes me see how messed up my love life is.
Most movies have a way of doing this. Films show us unrealistic relationships. They provide us with images of perfect couples, ones that barely fight and have matching personalities. While this is good, for it provides us with change, in the end it leaves us feeling hopeless, and unworthy.
Then what is real love? What is a real relationship? After realizing that matches like “Jenna’s” and “Matt’s” don’t exist, I was faced with these thought provoking questions. But after some more chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream, and another chick flick movie with my mother, I began to understand what true love is. Love in a relationship, besides the sexual stuff, is like love in any family. Love between brother and sister, or mother and daughter. While at times that annoying little brother, that bratty little sister, or that bossy, domineering older sibling can make you full of hatred, the love you two share is there. It’s tough love.
The relationships created on TV are built off of pure, absolute adoration and kindness. Nothing else but that. While these are important parts of any relationship, there is much more to it. Love is about hate and anger. Love is about greed, sadness, disappointment and regret. You know what I mean. Don’t tell me you haven’t ever screamed “I hate you!” at your parents because they wouldn’t let you see your friends. You know how angry your little sister makes you after she spies on you while you are talking on the phone. But, you also know that afterwards, once the anger and hatred inside you has subsided, you feel regretful. You wish you hadn’t said and done the things you had done and said. Why? Love.
This realization has made me see the love that surrounds me. The love from my parents, sibling, friends, boyfriend, and cats. It has even showed me that behind the people who don’t think so fondly of me, that there is a tab bit of love between us. This real love, which is not presented in films, tops any romance in any chick flick. Even the one in Thirteen Going On Thirty.
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