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The True Freedom

April 8, 2011
By AGirlWithAStoryToTell BRONZE, Mahanoy City, Pennsylvania
More by this author
AGirlWithAStoryToTell BRONZE, Mahanoy City, Pennsylvania
2 articles 0 photos 6 comments

Favorite Quote:
Success is to be measured not to much by the position one has reached in life as by the obstacles which he has overcome.<br /> -Booker Taliaferro Washington

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Summary:

You every feel like you walk in a rut everyday or like the days are the so similar that they could be the same day? Well Zoey does and she wants more in life then the average human. She feels like she had been tortured by the man upstairs. But in her dreams she has her freedom and her world of the forest to run and soon maybe rule.
She falls asleep and her mind takes her to the body of a wolf with her pack. She leads them living in the forest only to be taken away in the morning trying to get her head out of that world. But she will soon find out that the world are more connected then she believes and soon she won't have to rip her head away from it.

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JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This book has 4 comments.

AGirlWithAStoryToTell BRONZE said...
on Jun. 17 2011 at 3:46 pm
AGirlWithAStoryToTell BRONZE, Mahanoy City, Pennsylvania
2 articles 0 photos 6 comments

Favorite Quote:
Success is to be measured not to much by the position one has reached in life as by the obstacles which he has overcome.<br /> -Booker Taliaferro Washington

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Thank you for the comment on my story and yeah editing is probably my weakest point.  I am still a new writer and am tring to again learn on the job. And I will check out your story for sure. But anyway thank you once again I will definitly go over it a couple more times and repost it.
AGirlWithAStoryToTell BRONZE said...
on Jun. 17 2011 at 3:39 pm
AGirlWithAStoryToTell BRONZE, Mahanoy City, Pennsylvania
2 articles 0 photos 6 comments

Favorite Quote:
Success is to be measured not to much by the position one has reached in life as by the obstacles which he has overcome.<br /> -Booker Taliaferro Washington

View profile
thank you for reading my novel for starters!! and ya I know editing isn't my strong point yet.... I will get it down one day. But I believe in learning on the job so to speak. It's like I have the read the thing four hundred times over again and move problems keep coming up. haha but i will definitly go over it some more and fix those problems. I have already checked out your story as well. It was amazing. Thank you again Ashley.
Ashley_Tucker said...
on May. 24 2011 at 4:22 pm
Ashley_Tucker, Granger, Indiana
0 articles 0 photos 66 comments

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I'm excited to see where this goes! You might want to go back and edit a little bit more, though. And this is more of a preferance thing, but I think you should the 'ya' to 'yeah'. Its perfectly fine when your texting and want to keep things short, but this is a novel. And when I see 'ya' I don't think 'yeah' so the dialogue sounds very strange. Check out my novel 'Shaya's Story, please (:
Writomania PLATINUM said...
on May. 23 2011 at 12:08 am
Writomania PLATINUM, New Delhi, Other
22 articles 0 photos 119 comments

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Hi.. your story seems pretty good but your pitch has several grammatical errors which, im sure can be sorted out on a seond read. For instance, instead of the word "than", you've used "then".. this is pretty disconcerting because the pitch is what attracts the reader to read your book..

anyhow, the story is pretty interesting but watch out for the typos..

Could you check out my work, "the diary of a teenaged lunatic" and leave your comments on it?

thanks..