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In The Mind Of A Psycho
Author's note: I thought up this story when I was struggling with my own problems, this story taught me as I wrote it, be grateful, because some people have it much much worse.
Chapter One-
My alarm goes off as I sit up and stretch my arms, which causes my pink and blue comforter to slide down. Purple catches my eye, purple, as in my pig Peggy.
"Peggy," I give her a look that says 'you know what I'm thinking.' That pig doesn't budge, so I point my finger down, stating firmly
"down!" To my relief she hops down and prances up to me. Withholding a giggle I tell Peggy what a good little piggy she is; like I have done everyday since I was four years old. My feet slide down to the ground and guide me in the direction of my closet where I pick out a random shirt, happening to be a black and white top that I match with my black skirt then stick a bow tie on the collar and flip a hat over my ponytail.
“Come along Piggy, food time.” I encourage her along while snatching my unicorn patterned school bag. I arrive in the kitchen and see I had gotten down there before dad so Peggy and walk over to the medication cabinet.
*One pop* *Two pop* *Three pop* *Four pop*
Four bottles, four popped lids, four pills, four separate gulps of milk from a glass cup to get down the ADHD, bipolar depression, and dyslexia controllers.
“Lauren, you know you're not allowed to use glass cups.” Dad’s hands wrap around the cup, removing it from my hand and pouring the milk into a plastic blue cup.
“Sorry, I guess I forgot again dad.”
“That’s fine sweetie, Did you sleep well?
Yeah, My dream just swirled a bunch of colors.”
“That’s very interesting sweetie, come sit down now, and eat your cereal.
Dad places a bowl of fruity pebbles in front of me with a spoon.
“Dad I remember how to make cereal.”
“You couldn't remember to use a plastic cup this morning.” Did he have to point that out?
“Yeah, I guess you're right.”
“Besides, remember last time?”
*Flashback*
Lauren walks downstairs and grab the cereal from the designated spot. Getting a bowl she opened the box and poured in some cereal. She awaited the
rainbow colored pieces to fall in her bowl like they did everyday, and was meet with ugly brown ones! She had, by accident, grabbed her dad’s box of Cocoa Pebbles. That was more than Lauren could take she lost it. The bowl was flung and Lauren screamed. She broke down, thrashing and screaming. Her dad ran in and restrained her. The bowl clattered to the ground as he pulled her arms behind her back. He was restraining her and holding her together, in place.
“Let me go!” She cried.
I remember crying and loosing my self.
“Lauren no calm down.” She starts going over her therapy tricks and calm down. “Daddy they weren't rainbow.” She twisted and turned to look over her shoulder at his face and started crying.
“It's okay sweetie, I know it's my fault, it's my fault.” He had explained having put his box there when she had gone to her therapy appointment one day forgetting to place his box in the right spot and purchasing a new box of her cereal.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I cringe at the memory and take the bowl.
“Okay fine you win.” I hang my head and grab my spoon, tying Peggie's leash to the chair.
“So what pet have you got today?” Dad points to my Peggy.
“Why can't you see her it's Peggy!”
“The Peggy the great!” I laugh and throw my hands up.
“Oh…” Dad is looking down and frowning. I see as he tries not to look upset. “Dad?”
“Yes Lauren?”
“Peggie's not really there is she?”
“Of course she is!” His head pops up. He said it to enthusiastically so I can tell he is lying.
“You said she is so she is.”
“No shes not.”
“Lauren if you say she's there she is there!”
He grabs my hands.
“Do you understand me?” I can tell he is just trying to cheer me up so I nod my head, but I can feel a tear slip. Dad doesn't so I wipe it away.
“Okay then off to school.” I feel another tear fall too quickly for me to swipe, leading dad to do it after he places my bowl in the sink.
I grab Peggie's leash, my book bag, and head out skipping. I had forgotten what he had said and just looked forward to school.
“Lalala...off to school....lalala…” I skipped and started singing as I walked to school.
Chapter two-
I walk through the high school doors humming on my way to my locker. There I meet James my bestest friend since she was five.
“Hello James.” I always loved her long flowing straight brown hair and green eyes that reminded me of fresh grass. James is my youngest friend since she is twelve and the skinniest. I get a few strange looks from people after saying hello to her and she and I just roll our eyes. People always stare, everyday.
“Ha ha, why do they do that everyday I can't talk to my friend?” wondered out loud to James.
“They are just jealous of you.”
“I doubt that.”
They keep staring and I decide to entertain them if they are gonna stare so much. “Ello want some sprinkles for your monkeys?!”
Topping it off with a real big smile. Of course the students all react the way i want them too, turning away and muttering to each other. Grabbing my books I point out Peggy to James.
“Do you like her?”
“Yes she is lovely.” James says with a flawless smile that I longed to have instead of my dull smile.
“Well good bye.” I say it kind of sharply so I can snap out of the unexpected sad slap.
“Bye Lauren, see you later.” James waves her delicate little fingers in the air and slowly fades out. I smile when I notice the day had gone pretty well so far. I prance into my first class and everyone turns to see who is walking so happily into a math. Once realizing it was just me, most turned back to their lives others keep looking in my direction. '
“Please don’t stare, your making Peggy uncomfortable.''
Some people give me weird looks crazed looks and I skip to my seat not giving a flying gorilla’s face. My hand goes straight up.
“Yes Lauren?” “
“May I write on the board?”
“Why of course you may.” Teachers were always nice to me. Letting me do stuff others can't. That probably ticks some of them off. I can tell because when I look back at the class I see a mixed of faces. Some smiled sadly, others snickered and others frowned, some even gave my dirty hand signs. All the faces and hand gestures
confused me and I looked away scared. Teenagers were so weird. I grab a bright blue marker and start drawing.
“Swirly, swirly, swirly, dot, dot, slash.” I sing as I scratch the board with the utensil. I stop and look at the board, admiring it you might say.
“Maybe a face?”
I turn towards the teacher.
“Yes maybe.” She says smiling with that smile. That smile I liked because it was a true smile; a true ‘I'm a normal girl smile.’ I finished my picture and write ' ‘Dedicated to Peggy' under it. I sit back down at my seat in the back, petting Peggy.
“That's for you Peg's.” I whisper, so i thought. I see the teacher give me a weird look then compose herself.
''So Lauren who is Peggy?''
“Oh shes my pig!” Now I know why she was giving a weird look, she just wanted to know who Peggy was!
“How nice.” I can see she is, for some reason, trying not to let her smile fall and turns to the whole class.
“So today class We will talk about integers.” I take my notebook out and start doodling. I wonder why she wanted to frown? Peggy is a friendly pig.
Here and there I wrote some of the equations but I didn't understand any of it. What were integers?
Chapter three-
Throughout the day I show Peggy to all my teachers which they react to by saying hi and waving. She was a big hit!
A few people nearly step on her on the way to lunch. I end up having to place her into my bookbag. Lunch consisted of the usual, meaning I wrote more song lyrics, avoiding all human interactive and food.
“It’s really a disgusting shame;
The breakers break the broken, then the broken break themselves.”
The Secret Singer~
I was super happy on the way to piano knowing this teacher would especially love Peggy. I make my way to piano and get even more excited. I loved piano! Playing the piano, the long slick keys, the sound they make, how they feel under my hands , the true look of admiration on another student’s face. I run in and greet Mr. Parks. Hes always been my favorite teacher ,just a super cool dude.
“Hello Lauren, Need to play?”
“Yes, please!” Another good thing about this teacher, he always knows when I need to play at the beginning of the class. I jump up
and down in excitement startling Peggy.
“OINK!”
“Well go ahead!”
He waves to his personal piano and I run over. This class was great he seemed to just knew when I needed to play a song before class! I run quickly so I can be there before too many students come in.
I close my eyes. I hop on to the comfort of the piano seat and pretend to think of a piece to play.
“Hummmm..” I c*** my head and smile at the teacher.
“Do you need help? He asked smiling. We both knew this was just routine.We both knew I always have a piece to play.
“NOPE, I got one!” I start playing as kids file in so I close my eyes quickly so I can't see them. I start playing forgetting everyone else and everything else.
All I see are the notes of sharps and B flats and many others jumping around behind my eyelids. All my problems disappeared. For a moment I can picture a crowd with me on the stage, spotlight.
“You're gonna see things you might not wanna see
It's still not that easy for me underneath”
Adam Lambert~
Everyone is clapping and cheering as I finish of my piece, roses and lilies thrown on to the stage as I take a bow. My eyes open allowing me to see I had really taken a bow with the whole class cheering and clapping. A tear slips down my face and my smile quivers. Mr.Parks has an arm around in me in about two seconds and My smile gets bigger as all the kids quiet down just staring amazed. Suddenly a boy burst into another hectic round of applause and the class starts following along. I smile and start laughing. I wipe the tear away and sniffle.
“That was wonderful Lauren. What was the song called?”
I looked at the teacher happily. It was one of my favorite songs. I answer immediately.
“Underneath by Adam Lambert.”
“What a lovely song Lauren, lovely choice of song, thank you.”
I smile and sit down in my assigned piano. Sitting down reach into my bag, Pulling out the folder labeled ‘Escape’ that is overflowing with sheets of notes just waiting to be played. I place the first one that I can grab and see it is a song I know well. A very pretty piece that was enjoyable to play.Next is the surround sound part. My headphones were my prized possession and I plugged the leather-bound speakers carefully into the piano and place them on my head.
Once again my eyes are covered by eyelids along with long fingers being placed onto the keys. Notes begin to flow out of my hands directly into my skull which causes a chain reaction of tears and smiling. Always a great way to finish of a Monday.
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