“The best cooks of the kingdom have come to cook tomatoes for you! Please enjoy,” the servant said as he stepped aside to allow the other servant to fill our table with tomato food. I already felt like throwing up at the sight of red tomatoes on my plate. The smell was even worse. There were bruschetta, caprese salad, fried green tomatoes, galayet bandora, gazpacho, porra antequerana, paprykarz szczeciński, and panzanella! Probably all the tomatoes in the kingdom were being set before us!

“Ayden, try this tomato soup. And tell me how it tastes,” Lord Jabez said as he passed the soup in my direction with his sly eyes looking into mine.

Oh no…this is an order from my master…oh no…oh no… I thought to myself as I gave a quick sideways glance to the servant and slowly picked up my spoon.

I slowly and dreadfully sipped the soup until Lord Jabez exclaimed, “Are those garlic fried tomatoes?”

“Yes, they are!” the servant happily said, “Care to try some?”

“I know I said I hate tomatoes, but I never said I hate garlic fried tomatoes, eh?” Lord Jabez said as he ate a few of his tomatoes.

“Really, these tastes horrible,” Lord Jabez said as he reached out for another dish of garlic fried tomatoes, “I hate these.”

“Yes…” I said as I put down my spoon and started making smiley faces with my pasta and tomato sauce.

After an hour, which felt like an eternity, passed the servant allowed us to have freedom from the table of tomatoes. Not long afterwards, I overheard the servant and Lord Jabez having a conversation.

“But don’t you think the man is me? We surely need not to waste time on these troublesome trials!” Lord Jabez cried.

“You may be right…for you are a lord and he is but a servant. However, what if your servant is the man that the king is looking for? What would happen to me? Even if your servant disagrees to participate in this activity now, I will be the one who makes sure that he finishes to the end,” the servant replied.

“Ugh! All right then! When I see the king in a few days, being the special man, I shall tell him that you wasted so much time to bring me there!” Lord Jabez said in anger.

The next hour we were called back, and it was announced that we would not be able to sleep until 3 AM.

“Seriously? I need my beauty sleep!” Lord Jabez shouted.

“You mean your ugly sleep…” I muttered under my breath.

“WHAT? What did you just say?” Lord Jabez asked, glaring at me.

“I said you mean your snugly sleep,” I answered, mimicking the servant’s innocent voice.

“Back to where we were…you two are to stay in different rooms, in a different house, and wait for a signal from me to be allowed to go to sleep. Then, you two will be awakened at 6 AM to bake a cake. Is that clear?” the servant said.

“Very clear, but very useless,” Lord Jabez complained.

Being in a new place, I uncomfortably tried to make myself comfortable to get ready for the night. I could hear Lord Jabez in the next room complaining.

“THIS ROOOOOOOM IS THE WORSTTTTT,” Lord Jabez shouted.

“My lord, if you do not mind me interrupting, I believe that I can hear everything that you say,” I said.

“Oh well, oh well…good…I think,” Lord Jabez said.

“Baa baa black sheep have you any wool? Yes sir, yes sir, three bags full,” I started to sing as I could hear Lord Jabez groan.

“Will you be singing the night through Ayden?” he complained.

“Well, that’s my favorite song! But I can sing you my second favorite song too! Mary had a little lamb little lamb little lamb!” I started.

After I had sung threw “Mary Had A Little Lamb” for five times in different types of voices I asked Lord Jabez if he wanted to hear another song.

“Let’s have a challenge Ayden. You seem to be very talkative at night, unlike you are in the morning,” Lord Jabez said.

“Well now that’s very true sir. Once the night falls it is a very interesting thing to-“

“No wonder the servants who sleep with you complain that they can’t sleep,” Lord Jabez said under his breath.

“You break my heart!” I started to sing.

“Now for the challenge!!!!” Lord Jabez cried, “Let us see if you can stay quiet for say…five minutes.”

“Five minutes is too long,” I complained, “Lord Jabez, I hardly speak in the morning, so I talk all through the night! You cannot torture me like this!”

“This challenge starts in three, two, one,” Lord Jabez said.

Then, there was silence. I fidgeted with my fingers, then the dirt on the floor, then I started sucking my thumb to see if it would help me stay quiet. But I could hold it no longer.

“Did you know that you can’t hum if you hold your nose?”

“AYDEN! I had asked you to stay quiet for only five minutes, but you tell me a random fact in less than two minutes of starting this challenge?” Lord Jabez yelled at me.

“Baa baa black sheep have you any wool…” I started again.

This time I sung “Baa Baa Black Sheep” mimicking Lord Jabez’s voice, and then our cook’s voice, and then our cat’s voice.

“Did you know that some cats are allergic to humans?” I asked.

“I can no longer bear your tomfoolery! It is almost 3 AM so hopefully we will have some peace soon…” was Lord Jabez’s reply.

           I went on talking about my room, my friends, the other servants, this trial, and facts about sleeplessness until the servant walked into our rooms one at a time and announced that we would be allowed to sleep. Lord Jabez immediately became quiet, but I could not bear the silence.

           “I’m bored,”

           “AHH! AYDEN! I NEED SOME SLEEP!” Lord Jabez shouted. He seemed to be having a tantrum.

           “But I need something to say! My tongue cannot stay quiet…” I replied.

           “Let me tell you something. Whenever I couldn’t go to sleep when I was younger, my mother always told me to count the sheep passing over the fence in my mind. Would you care to try that? After hearing your nursery rhymes for several hours now I found that you seem to like sheep…” he said.

           “Sure!” I shouted, and started immediately, “One sheep, two sheep, three sheep, four sheep, five sheep, six sheep, seven sheep, eight sheep, nine sheep, ten sheep…”

           “No, no no! You were supposed to count them in your mind! Not aloud!” Lord Jabez cried.

           “But I don’t know that comes after ten sheep!” I cried back.

           “Figure that out for yourself! I need some sleep!”

           “Ten one sheep, ten two sheep, ten three sheep, ten four sheep, then five sheep…” I went on as Lord Jabez groaned.

After a long time of counting sheep, I became bored, so I started dancing and singing.

“HAS A BOMB HIT YOUR ROOM OR SOMETHING?” Lord Jabez ejaculated, “You are terribly loud!”

“I’m safe!” I shouted and continued to sing.

Not long afterwards the servant entered our rooms to announce that it is 6 AM and to come to the kitchen. I raced out leaving Lord Jabez behind.

“Ready to make a cake?” the cook asked us.

“For sure!” I shouted. I glanced at Lord Jabez, surprised to see him look like someone who hadn’t slept at all.

“Then I will give you each the ingredients that are not measured and leave you two to make your cakes!” the cook announced.

“Wait. Aren’t you going to give us a recipe or something?” Lord Jabez asked.

“Nope. The servant told me not to,” the cook and as she left the kitchen.

We started off right away. I, being used to visiting the kitchen often, found my way around quite easily. I dumped the flours and the eggs and whisked everything around singing a song.

“Humpty dumpty sat on a wall, humpty dumpty had a great fall!” I sang until I realized something, “If there was a sack a flour next to the wall that humpty dumpty fell off, do you think he might have been OK?”

There was no answer. Lord Jabez had started to ignore me now. We soon finished up our cake as I sang the whole two hours through. Then, we presented our cakes to the servant who had just woke up.

“I shall try Lord Jabez’s cake first,” he said as he took a bite, which he spit right back out, “Your cake seems a little weird…let’s see…um…what did you use for your flour?”

Lord Jabez pointed to a bowl, so I hurried over to taste a bit of it.

“It is salt!” I announced.

“Yes, yes…no wonder the cake looked a little weird…but you know, salt and flour are the same color!” Lord Jabez said, making his excuse.

“Let me try yours, Ayden,” he said, taking a bite, “Hmm…yum…! This is not good! This is perfect!!”

“Oh, a little more sugar always helps,” I said.

“Very well done!” the servant said as he allowed the scribe to take a bit of both cakes in order for him to write down the details.

“Now you two will be taken to the middle of the busy streets to sing a song!” the servant announced to Lord Jabez’s dread.

Soon we were in the middle of the streets where a lot of busy people were getting ready for their busy day.

“You may go first,” the servant said to Lord Jabez.

Lord Jabez stood at the stage and then looked into the crowd who was waiting for him to make his move.

“Uh…well…hello everyone…” Lord Jabez started. He looked very nervous. Then the servant gave him a signal to start singing with mortification, “Uh…the hills are alive!!! With the sound of music…the…the…birds dance along to my every song?!!!”

The people just started and walked away so Lord Jabez told me to go sing instead.

“BAA BAA BLACK SHEEP HAVE YOU ANY WOOL?” I started to sing as the children rushed to my direction.

“YES SIR YES SIR THREE BAGS FULLLLLLL!!!” I sung until the servant told me to stop.

“I think this will be enough,” he said as he signaled the scribe to take the recorded document to the king, “I believe that it will be rightful for the king to read over what you two have done for the past day, and then decide who the man is.”

“Well then,” Lord Jabez said, “I shall need to buy a new set of clothes in order to be prepared to meet the king!”

“I had better go take a shower so that the king doesn’t think I’m smelly!” I shouted.