This is my story; or rather one of many invisible faces. Maybe this is your story. This could be your best friend's or neighbor's story. I am disabled. Yes, I still have all my limbs. No, I don't need a wheelchair. I am psychologically disabled.

What does that mean? I have a mental illness or mental illnesses that keep me from doing day to day activities. This doesn't mean I take mental health days, which are important, it means I can't do "normal" activities such as going outside or holding down a full time job. Without my service dog I can not leave the house, go shopping, eat or really even leave my room. I felt completely alone until one day I found a Tumblr (I know you're judging me just hold in there) and I realized there was a word for what was wrong with me. I decided to share my top 5 struggles with you in hopes of showing someone they are not alone or in hopes of teaching someone.

1. I probably beat myself up more than anyone. I cry and beg and plead with myself just to do a basic task. Something as simple as going to school or work becomes an impossible task. "Everyone else has problems so what makes you so special?" I ask myself. No matter what I try my brain will not comply.
2. Giving up on anything is like trying to move a mountain. Even if it's unhealthy. Any change to my schedule can send me spiraling. This is also why when friends cancel or are late it often sends me into a panic attack. Every minute of my day is meticulously planned to make sure I have enough spoons (if you don't know what that is Google the spoon theory) for the day.
3. There is no such thing as an easy task. Anyone who meets my service dog thinks he is a breeze but even taking him outside to do his business can be the biggest obstacle of my day.
4. I am allowed to have good days. That doesn't mean I have magically been fixed, although that's what I'm going to tell myself. Nothing makes me feel more guilty than my good days. I think to myself "see this isn't so bad! Why are you so useless all the time?".
5. I am real. I am allowed to use the word disabled to describe myself. Many people will disagree. Maybe they aren't wrong to. I don't know what it's like to be physically disabled. I just know that I am trapped by a brain that doesn't know how to function. Not too long ago I would have been tossed in some horrible mental hospital because no one would know what to do.

I am your daughter. Your brother. Your co-worker. I am a nameless face who is just trying to live. Please learn from my story. Do not say "I'm sorry". Instead, be understanding. Be patient. Most importantly, say you believe me.