As far as I could remember, he didn’t clothe himself in anything more than a typical stripped shirt and loose denim. It seemed to me that his perception of himself was of a completely average boy that was neither lost nor desperate to be found.

Ever since I knew him, I was quietly impressed by his unspoken humility. He was subtle but a pleasure to befriend. I watched him engage in lively conversations with others. I would observe the way he gestured his hands in the air reflecting his belief for his words. The way he would ingenuously exaggerate his stories as if they mattered the world to him. Sometimes I would seize the moment to gaze into his eyes. But I couldn’t. They were mesmerizing. The intensity was strangely captivating. My stare was unable to withstand the striking blaze in his eyes which seemed to be looking at me with the fire of a thousand suns. I would be powerless.

So I imagined more than a thousand scenarios where I build a beautiful relationship between us in my heart. In there, I would converse with him without hesitation. It was easier to hold his hand without fearing my insecurity. When I could think about us with limitless liberty, I found it easier to dive into the sparkle of his eyes and immerse myself into the stories that would slowly unfold. I could stay there forever. But sadly my endearing relationship was only a figment of my imagination. A weak testament of love. Reality was much less in my favor. I was of no literal significance to him or his heart. My real life was far from the mystifying romance, the glamour and its vigor. My real life didn’t have him.

Every time I would try to forget about his mere existence in my life, my heart would persuade me to think about him and the greatness of my made-up life.  I wanted to stay there in his world of surrealism and witness the starry night calling me, and the oak trees whispering my presence. The mysterious aromas encircling my fantasy, all of what was drawing me in through its strange silence. The beauty was enthralling. He was dragging me into this illusionary charm. I was seemingly convinced enough to never look back. Seconds apart I could belong to him forever. But instead I sighed with pity, and I felt distraught. I could perish my world with a whirl of my finger and turn it to dust. But that would be unlawful and highly demented. I would become homeless without its presence. A stranger in my mind. I was alone. I was lost. But I wasn’t scared.

How could I be afraid when he was close to my presence? I felt my heart-beat grow stronger as he neared into the course of where I stood. I was losing my grip, my speech, and all the confidence that spurred out of me in the heat of seconds. He glanced and silently acknowledged my presence as he casually separated from my path. I remained flabbergasted for entire seconds. Then I walked away. I hope to see him once again.